1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:02:10,217 --> 00:02:12,132 Ow. 4 00:02:31,281 --> 00:02:34,719 Despite all the warnings, she was smoking in bed. 5 00:02:34,763 --> 00:02:38,723 Fell asleep. Bad move. 6 00:02:46,122 --> 00:02:48,472 And the fire begins. 7 00:02:57,264 --> 00:03:00,049 Show time. 8 00:03:02,878 --> 00:03:06,098 Don't worry, ma'am! I'm here to save you! 9 00:03:09,363 --> 00:03:12,888 Keep those people back! This is an emergency! 10 00:03:12,931 --> 00:03:17,197 Don't you dare die on me! 11 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:22,550 Breathe, damn it, breathe! 12 00:03:22,593 --> 00:03:25,335 She's gonna make it! She's gonna make it! 13 00:03:30,949 --> 00:03:32,734 What the-- 14 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,389 Oh, damn! 15 00:04:36,711 --> 00:04:40,236 Rick, wait up! 16 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:42,325 Okay, I'll check it out. 17 00:04:48,679 --> 00:04:53,293 Though it may be hard to believe that a single biology professor... 18 00:04:53,336 --> 00:04:56,034 making in excess of $17,500 a year... 19 00:04:56,078 --> 00:05:01,301 could manage to find time to grade your first biology research papers, I did. 20 00:05:01,344 --> 00:05:05,043 As you can see, there was a shocking statistical anomaly. 21 00:05:05,087 --> 00:05:07,785 Pretty much all of you got A's. 22 00:05:11,223 --> 00:05:13,182 You deserve to congratulate yourselves. 23 00:05:13,225 --> 00:05:16,011 I've got a real good feeling about this group. 24 00:05:16,054 --> 00:05:18,579 I think that the parade of A's is gonna continue... 25 00:05:18,622 --> 00:05:21,321 straight through to the end of the semester. 26 00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:25,194 So much for the bell curve. Bell curves suck, man! 27 00:05:25,237 --> 00:05:27,457 Mr. Kane! 28 00:05:27,501 --> 00:05:30,330 Dr. Kane, seems to be a mistake here. 29 00:05:30,373 --> 00:05:34,551 You see, you see, my brother and I each got a C-minus on our reports. 30 00:05:34,595 --> 00:05:36,814 C-minus. Me too. 31 00:05:36,858 --> 00:05:40,078 Allow me to share something with the entire class. 32 00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:42,342 Um, last night, as I was grading papers, 33 00:05:42,385 --> 00:05:47,085 I came across two gems, both entitled "Cells are Bad." 34 00:05:47,129 --> 00:05:49,392 Both with just one paragraph, 35 00:05:49,436 --> 00:05:51,655 which I unfortunately committed to memory. 36 00:05:51,699 --> 00:05:53,657 "Cells are bad. 37 00:05:53,701 --> 00:05:57,269 "My uncle lives in a cell. It's 10 foot by 12, 38 00:05:57,313 --> 00:06:01,056 "and he has to read the same old boring magazine every day. 39 00:06:01,099 --> 00:06:05,930 The end." 40 00:06:05,974 --> 00:06:10,500 You're talking about our papers, aren't you, Dr. Kane? Yes, I am. 41 00:06:10,544 --> 00:06:13,373 Although my standards are nowhere near where they used to be, 42 00:06:13,416 --> 00:06:17,681 I still could not bring myself to put an "A" on top of those beauties. 43 00:06:17,725 --> 00:06:21,337 I hope you understand, guys.Sure. 44 00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,383 Yeah, okay. 45 00:06:23,426 --> 00:06:25,733 Let's get back to work at the periodic table here, 46 00:06:25,776 --> 00:06:27,604 which is not, as some of you suppose-- 47 00:06:27,648 --> 00:06:30,694 A meteor? Where? 48 00:06:30,738 --> 00:06:34,611 Uh-huh. Route 89-A. 49 00:06:34,655 --> 00:06:37,179 Yeah, yeah, got it. 50 00:06:37,222 --> 00:06:40,443 Yeah, rest assured, I will be there. 51 00:06:40,487 --> 00:06:46,406 Okay, bye. 52 00:06:46,449 --> 00:06:50,453 So how does it look, Professor? 53 00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:52,412 It's tight. 54 00:06:52,455 --> 00:06:57,286 Uh, really, really tight, Nadine, but not too tight. 55 00:06:57,329 --> 00:06:59,723 You just don't have the points. I'm sorry. 56 00:06:59,767 --> 00:07:02,422 But don't take it too hard. Geology's a lot tougher subject than people think. 57 00:07:02,465 --> 00:07:05,425 Are you sure? Couldn't you just check again? 58 00:07:05,468 --> 00:07:10,125 I really need this credit to get into nursing school. 59 00:07:10,168 --> 00:07:12,432 Nursing school? 60 00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:14,608 Wouldn't you be more comfortable in a different profession, 61 00:07:14,651 --> 00:07:19,308 one where people's lives were not dependent on you? 62 00:07:19,351 --> 00:07:23,138 Actually, what I really want to be is Miss Arizona, 63 00:07:23,181 --> 00:07:27,229 but my pageant consultant says that nursing school will really impress the judges. 64 00:07:27,272 --> 00:07:29,231 Makes me look like I want to help people. 65 00:07:29,274 --> 00:07:31,494 Ready for lunch? 66 00:07:33,496 --> 00:07:36,281 Or... have you already eaten? 67 00:07:36,325 --> 00:07:38,719 I was just concluding a teacher-student conference... 68 00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:41,461 with Nadine here, Ira. Harry, 69 00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:47,075 your dedication to your job is an inspiration to us all. 70 00:07:47,118 --> 00:07:51,427 Regrettably, Nadine, I have a prior lunch engagement with Professor Kane. 71 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,995 We'll talk about your extra credit later, okay? 72 00:07:54,038 --> 00:07:57,346 Cheer up. 73 00:07:57,389 --> 00:07:59,261 Let me grab my stuff. 74 00:08:04,919 --> 00:08:08,052 Where you taking me? Meteor hit last night. 75 00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:10,490 Oh, that's what that was.Yep. 76 00:08:10,533 --> 00:08:14,015 As the Glen Canyon official representative of the U.S. Geological Survey, 77 00:08:14,058 --> 00:08:16,321 I have been assigned to check it out. 78 00:08:16,365 --> 00:08:19,499 I'm taking you along in case I actually have to do something scientific. 79 00:08:19,542 --> 00:08:22,937 Then we eat. You're an official representative of the U.S.G.S.? 80 00:08:22,980 --> 00:08:24,895 Signed up over the Internet. 81 00:08:24,939 --> 00:08:27,507 What, were you on some cheerleader site... 82 00:08:27,550 --> 00:08:31,249 and you accidentally got linked over to the U.S.G.S. site? 83 00:08:31,293 --> 00:08:33,513 Something like that. 84 00:08:33,556 --> 00:08:35,471 Watch her, now. Take it easy. That's my baby. 85 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:38,169 There you go. Take it easy. 86 00:08:38,213 --> 00:08:41,303 Whoa! Whoa! Come on! 87 00:08:41,346 --> 00:08:45,525 Be careful! Who's gonna pay me for the damage to my goddamn car? 88 00:08:45,568 --> 00:08:48,832 Son, I told you, we don't do that. It's force majeure. 89 00:08:48,876 --> 00:08:53,620 Force majeure, my ass! That car's a classic '73 Buick Riv. 90 00:08:53,663 --> 00:08:56,536 Hey, now, who are you? 91 00:08:56,579 --> 00:09:00,278 Harry Block, United States Geological Survey. 92 00:09:00,322 --> 00:09:02,629 This is my secretary, Ira Kane. 93 00:09:02,672 --> 00:09:06,546 We're here to investigate the meteor if, indeed, that is what it is. 94 00:09:06,589 --> 00:09:09,026 Of course it's damn meteor. It almost blew up my damn car. 95 00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:11,594 I'm still fuzzy on what you were doing there in the middle of the night. 96 00:09:11,638 --> 00:09:13,640 Yeah, with Betty Lou here. 97 00:09:13,683 --> 00:09:16,730 For the thousandth time, I was practicing for my fireman's exam, 98 00:09:16,773 --> 00:09:19,036 which, for your information, started about seven minutes ago, 99 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:22,257 so I would really appreciate it if you'd let me get outta here. 100 00:09:22,300 --> 00:09:25,129 So you and the blonde found the meteor? 101 00:09:25,173 --> 00:09:29,481 Yeah, I found it. It bounced my car 200 feet in the air. 102 00:09:29,525 --> 00:09:32,746 Okay, can I go? Bob, get him out of here right now. 103 00:09:36,663 --> 00:09:39,579 Don't leave town. 104 00:09:39,622 --> 00:09:43,931 Sheriff, is this the, um, 105 00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:45,933 the point of penetration? 106 00:09:45,976 --> 00:09:50,111 Yeah. It punched through into a cavern about 80 feet down. 107 00:09:52,156 --> 00:09:54,855 Now, that's a hole. 108 00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:01,949 Damn it! Next time, you're carrying this case. 109 00:10:01,992 --> 00:10:04,081 Hey, you're the U.S.G.S. representative. 110 00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:06,649 I believe that responsibility comes with the badge. 111 00:10:06,693 --> 00:10:11,567 Oh, my God. Look at that. 112 00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:14,614 I believe we've located the target. 113 00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:18,487 All right, two big smiles, fellas. Cheese! 114 00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:21,098 Okay, hold it up now. All right? 115 00:10:21,142 --> 00:10:23,753 Ohh! Got it. 116 00:10:23,797 --> 00:10:28,366 Ooh, it's hot. It's really hot. I'll hold you up, okay? 117 00:10:28,410 --> 00:10:30,194 Show me a little more nightstick. 118 00:10:30,238 --> 00:10:33,241 Look at these jackasses.Muscles. Muscle pose. 119 00:10:33,284 --> 00:10:36,026 Give me big smiles, fellas. Looking good, fellas. 120 00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:40,204 At ease, gentlemen! The Feds are here. 121 00:10:40,248 --> 00:10:42,642 Feds? What Feds? 122 00:10:42,685 --> 00:10:45,993 Who let you down here? Let's not get combative, Lieutenant. 123 00:10:46,036 --> 00:10:48,430 The U.S.G.S. and local law enforcement... 124 00:10:48,473 --> 00:10:50,998 have a long history of cooperation. 125 00:10:51,041 --> 00:10:54,392 We're just down here to get some scientific samples, if that's okay with you guys. 126 00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:56,568 Uh, yeah, sure. 127 00:10:56,612 --> 00:11:01,008 We got all the, uh, photographic evidence we need. Carry on. 128 00:11:01,051 --> 00:11:03,401 Thank you. Keep up the good work. 129 00:11:07,231 --> 00:11:08,711 Wow. 130 00:11:18,460 --> 00:11:21,550 It just hit last night, and it's got... 131 00:11:21,593 --> 00:11:24,248 stuff growing on it. 132 00:11:24,292 --> 00:11:26,250 Could be cave moss. 133 00:11:26,294 --> 00:11:30,037 Cave moss after just a few hours? That's peculiar. 134 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:32,430 Let's get a sample and get out of here. 135 00:11:38,959 --> 00:11:42,963 Ooh. 136 00:11:43,006 --> 00:11:44,965 It's bleeding. 137 00:11:45,008 --> 00:11:49,709 It's a rock that... bleeds. 138 00:11:49,752 --> 00:11:54,235 Now that's really peculiar. 139 00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:56,280 Let's bag it. 140 00:12:05,768 --> 00:12:10,294 I don't know if this whole Geological Society gig is all it's cracked up to be. 141 00:12:10,338 --> 00:12:14,864 I mean, yeah, it pads on my résumé, but am I growing as a person? 142 00:12:14,908 --> 00:12:19,042 Am I growing as a Division Three women's volleyball coach? 143 00:12:19,086 --> 00:12:21,741 Hmm? 144 00:12:21,784 --> 00:12:24,526 Are you gonna do those spectro-thingie tests it says to do in the guidebook? 145 00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:28,617 Spectrograph. Yeah, I will do a full spectroscopic analysis. 146 00:12:28,660 --> 00:12:30,706 Your résumé will shine. 147 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:34,797 Good. I gotta get to the game. Let me know if you find anything. 148 00:12:38,932 --> 00:12:42,500 Ira, are you sure you can handle this by your lonesome? 149 00:12:44,111 --> 00:12:45,808 All right, all right. 150 00:13:22,410 --> 00:13:24,542 That's impossible. 151 00:14:03,190 --> 00:14:06,367 Ten base pairs. 152 00:14:08,935 --> 00:14:10,850 That can't be. 153 00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:15,158 We need this! 154 00:14:15,202 --> 00:14:18,422 Come on, ladies! Look alive up here! Look alive! 155 00:14:23,079 --> 00:14:27,997 Tina, cover the line! When Lisa goes for the spike, you've got to cover the line! 156 00:14:28,041 --> 00:14:31,348 Lisa! Two hands, okay? Two hands! Harry! 157 00:14:31,392 --> 00:14:33,873 God gave you two goddamn hands for a reason! Harry! 158 00:14:33,916 --> 00:14:36,049 Big news. The most amazing thing. 159 00:14:36,092 --> 00:14:39,574 The meteor samples are teeming with one-celled organisms. 160 00:14:39,617 --> 00:14:41,445 Their metabolic rates are off the charts. 161 00:14:41,489 --> 00:14:45,188 They're dividing at an incredible rate. It's practically exponential. 162 00:14:45,232 --> 00:14:47,930 Their DNA has ten base pairs. 163 00:14:47,974 --> 00:14:49,976 Ten base pairs. That's good to know. Thank you, Ira. 164 00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:54,458 Harry, the DNA of all life on Earth has only four base pairs. 165 00:14:54,502 --> 00:14:58,898 Come on, ladies! Look alive! 166 00:14:58,941 --> 00:15:04,947 Harry, these are organisms from another world. 167 00:15:04,991 --> 00:15:07,036 They're aliens. 168 00:15:09,473 --> 00:15:12,041 Is the Nobel Prize paid in installments... 169 00:15:12,085 --> 00:15:13,825 or in a lump sum like the lottery? 170 00:15:13,869 --> 00:15:16,480 Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Here. My office. 171 00:15:16,524 --> 00:15:21,224 I'm not getting ahead of myself. I'm concerned about the potential tax consequences. 172 00:15:25,489 --> 00:15:28,579 Why in here? I just want to be a little cautious. 173 00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:34,890 Our discovery. 174 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,979 I'm all tingly. Yeah. 175 00:15:40,113 --> 00:15:41,288 Wow. 176 00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:46,858 I'm no biologist, 177 00:15:46,902 --> 00:15:50,862 but how many cells do single-celled organisms have? 178 00:15:50,906 --> 00:15:53,082 If we're gonna be big important scientists, 179 00:15:53,126 --> 00:15:55,519 you have to start to act the part. 180 00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:57,521 Why don't you take a look? 181 00:16:13,494 --> 00:16:15,539 There are multicellular organisms in there. 182 00:16:15,583 --> 00:16:18,107 Yes, I know. 183 00:16:18,151 --> 00:16:20,892 No, but they weren't there before. So they snuck in. 184 00:16:20,936 --> 00:16:23,721 No, there was no sneaking in. 185 00:16:23,765 --> 00:16:26,507 It's-- It's-- No, it's too amazing. 186 00:16:26,550 --> 00:16:29,075 What? It's-- It's-- 187 00:16:29,118 --> 00:16:31,077 It's like they're evolving. 188 00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:33,296 They're growing. 189 00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:36,691 They're growing into more complex organisms. 190 00:16:36,734 --> 00:16:38,649 It's evolution. 191 00:16:40,347 --> 00:16:43,306 Nobel, here we come. 192 00:16:43,350 --> 00:16:48,529 Yeah, but it's 200 million years worth in just a few hours. 193 00:16:50,922 --> 00:16:52,054 That's fast. 194 00:16:53,751 --> 00:16:57,277 You have no idea. 195 00:16:57,320 --> 00:16:59,801 All right, get ready! 196 00:16:59,844 --> 00:17:02,456 On my signal! Go! 197 00:17:02,499 --> 00:17:04,588 Come on! Go, go, go, go! 198 00:17:04,632 --> 00:17:09,158 Recruit, wake up. Wake up! 199 00:17:09,202 --> 00:17:11,508 Go! Go, go, go, go, go! 200 00:17:11,552 --> 00:17:14,642 The hose! This thing here! 201 00:17:14,685 --> 00:17:17,079 Sorry. 202 00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:19,081 Move it, move it, move it! Wayne, go! 203 00:17:19,125 --> 00:17:22,432 Go, go, go! Go! Come on! 204 00:17:22,476 --> 00:17:24,695 Ohh! Ohh! 205 00:17:27,133 --> 00:17:31,615 Well, buddy, these things happen. 206 00:17:31,659 --> 00:17:33,922 There's another test in six months. 207 00:17:33,965 --> 00:17:37,621 Six months? I can't wait six months. 208 00:17:37,665 --> 00:17:40,581 Well, at least you still got the pool gig over at the country club. 209 00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:42,757 Great. Thanks a lot. 210 00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:46,630 Ohh! Drive careful. 211 00:17:46,674 --> 00:17:52,288 I got it, I got it. I do this. 212 00:17:57,380 --> 00:17:59,774 Looks like we got some visitors. 213 00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:09,523 Okay, class, since this is our first field trip, 214 00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:12,395 I want you to obey a few very simple rules, okay? 215 00:18:12,439 --> 00:18:15,833 Ugh. Dirt. Nice footwear. 216 00:18:15,877 --> 00:18:18,662 Perfect for spelunking. I don't want you to touch anything. 217 00:18:18,706 --> 00:18:21,361 Don't move anything. Don't even breathe unless we tell you to... 218 00:18:21,404 --> 00:18:23,580 and wear your protective gloves at all times. 219 00:18:23,624 --> 00:18:26,670 Why do we have to do this? Firsthand field experience, that's why. 220 00:18:26,714 --> 00:18:28,803 The very meat and potatoes of geology. 221 00:18:28,846 --> 00:18:31,414 Is this gonna be on the final? Yes. 222 00:18:31,458 --> 00:18:33,895 Officer, nice to see you again. Hey, Professor. What's up? 223 00:18:33,938 --> 00:18:37,768 We came to pick up the rock. Pick it up? What? 224 00:18:37,812 --> 00:18:40,684 Yeah, well, we're--Just orders from the U.S.G.S. 225 00:18:40,728 --> 00:18:42,730 They want it under controlled conditions. 226 00:18:42,773 --> 00:18:44,688 It's very technical. 227 00:18:44,732 --> 00:18:47,604 Oh, technical stuff. It's technical. 228 00:18:47,648 --> 00:18:49,606 So, yeah, okay. Go right ahead. 229 00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:51,869 We're just gonna haul it right on out of here. Sure, go ahead. 230 00:18:51,913 --> 00:18:54,698 Deke and Danny, remember what we talked about, right? 231 00:18:54,742 --> 00:18:58,702 You guys are in charge of the hoisting. I want you to get the winch to the hole. 232 00:18:58,746 --> 00:19:03,229 Okay, fellas, stop nodding and just stare at me for a second, okay? 233 00:19:03,272 --> 00:19:05,405 Focus. 234 00:19:05,448 --> 00:19:08,277 You understand what I want you to do? Yeah, we got you. 235 00:19:08,321 --> 00:19:10,714 Yeah. Go do it. 236 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:25,207 Ira, I'm picking up a heavy creepy vibe here. 237 00:19:25,251 --> 00:19:27,731 Yeah, a lot has changed. 238 00:19:30,299 --> 00:19:32,258 Class, I know these look like mushrooms, 239 00:19:32,301 --> 00:19:34,738 but please try to refrain from eating them. 240 00:19:38,307 --> 00:19:41,310 Ugh! It smells disgusting. 241 00:19:41,354 --> 00:19:44,705 Nadine, sometimes science stinks. 242 00:19:44,748 --> 00:19:47,490 It's the game we play, baby. 243 00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:54,541 Rotten egg smell. Hydrogen sulfide, right? 244 00:19:54,584 --> 00:19:58,240 Yeah, and ammonia and methane. It's like it's converting the atmosphere. 245 00:19:58,284 --> 00:20:01,722 Look at all this rudimentary plant life. It's amazing. 246 00:20:03,767 --> 00:20:05,726 I don't wanna get all girly here, 247 00:20:05,769 --> 00:20:08,511 but I think I feel something wiggling around my toes. 248 00:20:13,342 --> 00:20:15,475 The ground does seem to be moving. 249 00:20:24,658 --> 00:20:26,790 Whoa! 250 00:20:26,834 --> 00:20:30,141 Flatworms. Millions of them! 251 00:20:30,185 --> 00:20:33,841 Eww! God! Ohh! 252 00:20:33,884 --> 00:20:36,322 God! Ohh! Whoa! 253 00:20:36,365 --> 00:20:39,107 Barely 18 hours, and we already have flatworms. 254 00:20:39,150 --> 00:20:41,327 Look, look, look! Hey, there they are! 255 00:20:41,370 --> 00:20:43,329 Hi, Dr. Kane! Hey, Dr. Kane! 256 00:20:43,372 --> 00:20:46,027 Ohh! 257 00:20:46,070 --> 00:20:48,595 Man, I almost went down on that one! That was awesome. 258 00:20:51,337 --> 00:20:53,904 Come here, little buddy. 259 00:20:57,821 --> 00:21:01,825 I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm not gonna hurt you. 260 00:21:06,352 --> 00:21:08,789 You didn't hurt it. You killed it. 261 00:21:08,832 --> 00:21:11,226 The oxygen must have killed it. 262 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,794 Must need its own atmosphere to live. 263 00:21:13,837 --> 00:21:16,840 Yeah. Why don't you grab a specimen jar? 264 00:21:16,884 --> 00:21:21,845 We'll try to scoop some of the atmosphere in there with them. 265 00:21:21,889 --> 00:21:26,023 Took us two billion years to do what they did in just a couple of days. 266 00:21:26,067 --> 00:21:29,984 Yeah. Those little germs are the embodiment of the American dream. 267 00:21:30,027 --> 00:21:33,988 Ahem. I'm, um, so sorry to interrupt, Professor Block, 268 00:21:34,031 --> 00:21:37,861 but am I correct in assuming that that little field trip... 269 00:21:37,905 --> 00:21:40,864 fulfilled my missing credit requirements? 270 00:21:40,908 --> 00:21:44,346 You know, Nadine, you're a very, very smart girl, 271 00:21:44,390 --> 00:21:47,088 but if you would just focus-- 272 00:21:50,918 --> 00:21:55,183 Um, Professor, the little wiggly worm things in there are breaking. 273 00:21:55,226 --> 00:21:57,794 Ira, look. Yeah. 274 00:22:02,408 --> 00:22:05,585 No, it's not breaking. It's splitting. 275 00:22:05,628 --> 00:22:08,239 It's mitosis. That's how they reproduce. 276 00:22:08,283 --> 00:22:12,026 No sex? No time for sex. 277 00:22:12,069 --> 00:22:14,028 Bummer. 278 00:22:14,071 --> 00:22:16,857 Oh, little guys are splitting again. 279 00:22:16,900 --> 00:22:20,034 Put it away. Look, we call no one, we tell no one. 280 00:22:20,077 --> 00:22:22,471 This is our secret, right? 281 00:22:22,515 --> 00:22:25,126 What about the government? Is this the kind of thing they usually get involved in? 282 00:22:25,169 --> 00:22:30,610 No. No government. I know those people. Absolutely not. You do? 283 00:22:30,653 --> 00:22:33,917 Look, this is our discovery and we have to maintain absolute control. 284 00:22:33,961 --> 00:22:38,095 We have to do more research and check our findings, document everything. 285 00:22:45,973 --> 00:22:48,323 Hey, Wayne. 286 00:22:48,367 --> 00:22:52,240 What's this? 287 00:22:52,283 --> 00:22:55,112 That would be an all-cotton towel, sir. 288 00:22:55,156 --> 00:22:57,941 I believe a Fieldcrest. It's a damp towel, Wayne. 289 00:22:57,985 --> 00:22:59,943 What the hell is a damp towel doing on my chaise? 290 00:22:59,987 --> 00:23:03,294 Okay. Let me go take care of this for you. 291 00:23:03,338 --> 00:23:05,384 You should, Wayne, because you're the pool manager. 292 00:23:05,427 --> 00:23:11,694 If anyone knows what to do about the dampness on my chair, it's you. 293 00:23:11,738 --> 00:23:15,568 "Oh, you know what to do with the towels 'cause you're the pool boy." 294 00:23:21,051 --> 00:23:23,402 What the hell? 295 00:23:34,021 --> 00:23:35,936 Where did you guys come from? 296 00:23:51,691 --> 00:23:53,867 You're dead now. 297 00:24:07,228 --> 00:24:08,751 Whoa! What the-- 298 00:24:15,584 --> 00:24:17,543 Okay. 299 00:24:21,068 --> 00:24:23,026 Hey, Harry, when I checked the samples this morning, 300 00:24:23,070 --> 00:24:25,159 I found three different subspecies. 301 00:24:25,202 --> 00:24:28,031 I mean, these things are evolving so quickly. 302 00:24:28,075 --> 00:24:30,556 God knows what we're gonna find when we get back. 303 00:24:30,599 --> 00:24:33,254 Whoa! Whoa! 304 00:24:36,083 --> 00:24:38,999 Please tell me there's an air show today. Damn. 305 00:24:42,829 --> 00:24:44,961 Ah, shit. 306 00:24:54,667 --> 00:24:57,060 Can I help you? Harry Block, Ira Kane. 307 00:24:57,104 --> 00:24:59,062 United States Geological Society. 308 00:24:59,106 --> 00:25:02,065 We're doing some important research. This is our site. 309 00:25:04,024 --> 00:25:06,243 I'm sorry. Not anymore. You're not on the list. 310 00:25:06,287 --> 00:25:09,595 What do you mean? We come here all the time. 311 00:25:09,638 --> 00:25:12,075 This is not a nightclub. Take it somewhere else. 312 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:14,425 Hey, I know my constitutional rights, okay? 313 00:25:14,469 --> 00:25:16,471 You can't tell me--Harry! Harry! Look, 314 00:25:16,515 --> 00:25:20,257 maybe you can call your superior, we can have a word with him. 315 00:25:23,478 --> 00:25:25,654 I have a Harry Block and an Ira Kane out here.... 316 00:25:25,698 --> 00:25:28,091 saying they have some connection to the site.Punk. 317 00:25:28,135 --> 00:25:31,094 What? You gotta know how to talk to the white man. 318 00:25:31,138 --> 00:25:33,619 The white man about to get his ass whupped. He doesn't like to be yelled at. 319 00:25:33,662 --> 00:25:35,621 Did you say Kane? Ira Kane? 320 00:25:35,664 --> 00:25:38,885 Yeah. Yeah. The Ira Kane? 321 00:25:38,928 --> 00:25:42,845 Oh, I've been looking forward to this for a long time. You bastard! 322 00:25:42,889 --> 00:25:45,587 You're history! Hey, hey, hey! 323 00:25:45,631 --> 00:25:48,111 Get his gun! You're crazy! 324 00:25:48,155 --> 00:25:50,592 Take it easy! All right, they're good. Up! 325 00:25:50,636 --> 00:25:54,727 You're responsible for the worst month of my life! Let me go! 326 00:25:54,770 --> 00:25:57,338 What the hell was that about? I don't know. 327 00:25:57,381 --> 00:26:01,168 All right, drive straight down to the command tent. They're expecting you. 328 00:26:01,211 --> 00:26:03,257 Go. Thank you. 329 00:26:03,300 --> 00:26:05,912 That's the guy that had me in diapers for over a month! 330 00:26:05,955 --> 00:26:08,305 Let me go! Who the hell was that? 331 00:26:37,552 --> 00:26:39,641 Gentlemen, just up here. General Woodman's expecting you. 332 00:26:39,685 --> 00:26:43,558 Russell Woodman? 333 00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:46,692 Ha ha! Ira! 334 00:26:46,735 --> 00:26:49,172 Ohh! What an unexpected surprise. 335 00:26:49,216 --> 00:26:52,175 For me too. I didn't realize we were on a hugging basis. 336 00:26:52,219 --> 00:26:55,701 The same old Ira Kane. And you must be? 337 00:26:55,744 --> 00:26:59,530 Harry Block, this is General Russell Woodman, head of U.S. Army research. 338 00:26:59,574 --> 00:27:02,055 General.Harry. 339 00:27:02,098 --> 00:27:04,187 So you two know each other? 340 00:27:04,231 --> 00:27:06,189 Ira used to work for me. Right, Ira? 341 00:27:06,233 --> 00:27:08,931 I worked with you, actually. 342 00:27:08,975 --> 00:27:13,109 Ira, you used to work in Army research at the Pentagon? Yeah. 343 00:27:13,153 --> 00:27:15,155 And all this time I thought you were just a schoolteacher. 344 00:27:15,198 --> 00:27:17,940 No. How did you find out about this, Russell? 345 00:27:17,984 --> 00:27:22,162 You leave the Pentagon, you don't call me, you don't write. 346 00:27:22,205 --> 00:27:24,512 We like to keep tabs on our prodigal sons. 347 00:27:24,555 --> 00:27:26,601 So you tapped my phone? 348 00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:28,777 No. We're not the KGB, Ira. 349 00:27:28,821 --> 00:27:32,694 Actually, we've been monitoring your computer. 350 00:27:32,738 --> 00:27:35,218 His computer? 351 00:27:35,262 --> 00:27:38,395 All those girls in the photos are over 18. 352 00:27:38,439 --> 00:27:41,703 Yes, I'm sure. I should have figured. 353 00:27:41,747 --> 00:27:45,620 You should've known better than to try to keep something this big from us. 354 00:27:45,664 --> 00:27:48,188 And the C.D.C.Ah! 355 00:27:48,231 --> 00:27:50,233 Just in time. Ira, this is Allison Reed, 356 00:27:50,277 --> 00:27:55,195 senior researcher in epidemiology at the... C.D.C. 357 00:27:55,238 --> 00:27:56,762 Nice underwear. 358 00:27:56,805 --> 00:27:59,199 A garter belt at a day function? 359 00:27:59,242 --> 00:28:01,418 I can do it. Thank you very much. Thank you. I'm okay. 360 00:28:01,462 --> 00:28:04,204 I'm okay. Dr. Kane. 361 00:28:04,247 --> 00:28:06,249 I'd heard about your recklessness, 362 00:28:06,293 --> 00:28:08,774 but you are way out of line on this one. 363 00:28:08,817 --> 00:28:11,254 Do you realize how dangerous this situation could have become? 364 00:28:11,298 --> 00:28:15,041 It's nice to meet you too. No need to play the blame game here. 365 00:28:15,084 --> 00:28:17,434 No harm, no foul. Suffice it to say... 366 00:28:17,478 --> 00:28:21,438 that we're all very appreciative the discovery made by Dr. Kane and Mr. Black. 367 00:28:21,482 --> 00:28:25,268 Block. Block. I'm sorry. 368 00:28:25,312 --> 00:28:27,749 The confirmation of the existence of life outside this planet-- 369 00:28:27,793 --> 00:28:29,751 Would be the greatest scientific discovery... 370 00:28:29,795 --> 00:28:32,319 of our time. Yes, actually. 371 00:28:32,362 --> 00:28:37,280 Yes, and you have my word that you'll be kept in the loop from this point forward. 372 00:28:37,324 --> 00:28:39,805 Oh, you son of a bitch. What do you mean, kept in the loop? 373 00:28:39,848 --> 00:28:42,068 General, we are the loop. 374 00:28:42,111 --> 00:28:44,461 We're not gonna cut you out, but we do need to take control. 375 00:28:44,505 --> 00:28:47,247 We're just following protocol, Ira. You remember protocol. 376 00:28:47,290 --> 00:28:51,033 I got some protocol right here for you, Russell. Come and get it! 377 00:28:51,077 --> 00:28:53,383 Look, the simple fact is, this research must continue... 378 00:28:53,427 --> 00:28:55,429 under careful government control and scrutiny. 379 00:28:55,472 --> 00:28:57,431 We've already secured the area. 380 00:28:57,474 --> 00:28:59,476 We're constructing an air lock into the cavern... 381 00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:01,696 and a state-of-the-art field research facility. 382 00:29:01,740 --> 00:29:03,829 So, you see, there's not a whole lot... 383 00:29:03,872 --> 00:29:08,659 for the science department of Glen Canyon Community College to do here. 384 00:29:08,703 --> 00:29:11,401 Did you catch that condescending tone with he says "Glen Canyon Community College"? 385 00:29:11,445 --> 00:29:13,664 We are following well established federal guidelines. 386 00:29:13,708 --> 00:29:16,319 Please, Russell. Don't pull this crap. We deserve to be here. 387 00:29:16,363 --> 00:29:20,062 You deserve to be here? 388 00:29:20,106 --> 00:29:22,891 You're lucky anybody's ever let you near a science laboratory again, Ira. 389 00:29:24,850 --> 00:29:28,070 You're a disgrace, and a dangerous one at that. 390 00:29:31,378 --> 00:29:34,468 Lieutenant, show these men out. 391 00:29:34,511 --> 00:29:37,514 This is horseshit. 392 00:29:37,558 --> 00:29:40,343 This is not over. 393 00:29:40,387 --> 00:29:43,346 You're in for a fight, Russell. 394 00:29:43,390 --> 00:29:47,350 Would you stop following me, please? Thank you. 395 00:29:47,394 --> 00:29:50,353 We're not gonna bend over and take this! 396 00:29:50,397 --> 00:29:53,704 Fruit basket for Russell Woodman! 397 00:29:53,748 --> 00:29:55,881 Happy holidays, General! 398 00:29:57,926 --> 00:30:01,843 Cute. 399 00:30:01,887 --> 00:30:06,369 Dr. Kane, are you asking me to bar the federal government... 400 00:30:06,413 --> 00:30:09,895 from involvement in a discovery as significant as this one? 401 00:30:09,938 --> 00:30:12,332 No, not at all. We're asking you to make sure... 402 00:30:12,375 --> 00:30:15,291 that the local scientists who actually made the discovery... 403 00:30:15,335 --> 00:30:17,380 continue to play a significant role. 404 00:30:17,424 --> 00:30:19,556 They've kept us out for almost two weeks. 405 00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:23,386 We put our lives on the line to find these little guys, Your Majesty. 406 00:30:23,430 --> 00:30:26,259 We just want to be there for them as they grow up. 407 00:30:26,302 --> 00:30:29,131 We were the first team at the meteor site, 408 00:30:29,175 --> 00:30:31,177 and all the initial testing was done in our lab, Judge. 409 00:30:31,220 --> 00:30:35,398 The facilities at Glen Canyon Community College are a joke. 410 00:30:35,442 --> 00:30:38,793 They weren't a joke when I went there, General. 411 00:30:38,837 --> 00:30:41,143 Okay. 412 00:30:41,187 --> 00:30:45,452 Your Honor, if the court would allow me to depose Dr. Kane? 413 00:30:45,495 --> 00:30:47,758 Depose me? 414 00:30:47,802 --> 00:30:50,413 We think your past is very relevant, Dr. Kane. 415 00:30:50,457 --> 00:30:55,418 These issues speak directly to his competence as a scientist. 416 00:30:55,462 --> 00:30:58,421 Dr. Kane, you were a top-level researcher... 417 00:30:58,465 --> 00:31:03,513 at USAMRID from '94 to '97, were you not? Yes, that's correct. 418 00:31:03,557 --> 00:31:06,777 And you were summarily dismissed in the summer of 1997. 419 00:31:06,821 --> 00:31:09,998 Any idea why? 420 00:31:10,042 --> 00:31:12,566 My services were no longer required? 421 00:31:12,609 --> 00:31:15,264 Uh-huh. So in your opinion, your firing... 422 00:31:15,308 --> 00:31:17,919 had nothing to do with an experimental anthrax vaccine... 423 00:31:17,963 --> 00:31:21,314 that you developed and administered to nearly 140,000 U.S. soldiers... 424 00:31:21,357 --> 00:31:23,969 in May of that year? 425 00:31:24,012 --> 00:31:27,450 I see where you're going with this. 426 00:31:27,494 --> 00:31:31,193 It may have been a factor. You'd have to ask the Joint Chiefs of Staff. 427 00:31:31,237 --> 00:31:33,717 I'll make a note to do that, but for now, 428 00:31:33,761 --> 00:31:37,547 can you tell me what happened to the soldiers that were inoculated with your vaccine? 429 00:31:37,591 --> 00:31:40,855 Well, none of them got anthrax, if that's what you're asking. 430 00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:44,206 Yeah. What did they get? 431 00:31:44,250 --> 00:31:48,254 Um, well, as with any new vaccine, 432 00:31:48,297 --> 00:31:50,473 there were certain side effects associated with it. 433 00:31:50,517 --> 00:31:52,867 Could you be more specific? 434 00:31:52,911 --> 00:31:55,435 It was a wide range of things. It's very technical. 435 00:31:55,478 --> 00:31:57,611 I'd hate to waste the court's time getting into it right now. 436 00:31:57,654 --> 00:32:00,440 Humor me. 437 00:32:00,483 --> 00:32:03,791 Some, uh, debilitating stomach cramps. 438 00:32:03,834 --> 00:32:06,185 Severe diarrhea. 439 00:32:06,228 --> 00:32:08,404 Memory loss. 440 00:32:08,448 --> 00:32:13,496 Yes. Go on. Any more symptoms? 441 00:32:13,540 --> 00:32:18,023 Partial facial paralysis, temporary blindness, drooling, 442 00:32:18,066 --> 00:32:23,550 bleeding gums, erectile dysfunction, uncontrollable flatulence. 443 00:32:23,593 --> 00:32:26,814 I think that's it. 444 00:32:26,857 --> 00:32:29,643 One more question. Do you happen to remember... 445 00:32:29,686 --> 00:32:32,254 what the soldiers called this illness, Dr. Kane? 446 00:32:38,957 --> 00:32:41,263 Yeah. They called it the Kane Madness. 447 00:32:46,616 --> 00:32:49,706 Keep your head up. 448 00:32:49,750 --> 00:32:52,535 You know she wants to give you some, right? 449 00:32:52,579 --> 00:32:55,103 Were you even in that courtroom? 450 00:32:55,147 --> 00:33:00,108 Getting barbecued like baby back ribs? It's all foreplay, baby. 451 00:33:08,073 --> 00:33:10,553 Oh! We've been hit. 452 00:33:10,597 --> 00:33:13,513 Forget the foreplay. We just got screwed. 453 00:33:17,604 --> 00:33:20,041 Empty. Bad. This is very, very bad. 454 00:33:20,085 --> 00:33:22,174 Damn it! 455 00:33:26,004 --> 00:33:29,007 I don't care who they are! Stealing is stealing! 456 00:33:30,530 --> 00:33:32,358 Perfect. 457 00:33:37,450 --> 00:33:41,584 They took the rock, the samples, all the little wormy critters. 458 00:33:41,628 --> 00:33:44,326 All the data's gone-- the JPEG files, the DNA sequences. 459 00:33:44,370 --> 00:33:47,068 They cleaned us out. I'm calling the cops. 460 00:33:47,112 --> 00:33:50,115 The cops? They are the cops! 461 00:33:51,899 --> 00:33:53,770 Then what? 462 00:34:06,914 --> 00:34:08,829 Let me ask you something. 463 00:34:08,872 --> 00:34:11,614 How come you get to be a colonel, and I'm just a private? 464 00:34:11,658 --> 00:34:16,184 I was a colonel. You obviously served your country with distinction. 465 00:34:16,228 --> 00:34:20,623 Consider yourself lucky. The penalty for impersonating an officer is 5 years in prison. 466 00:34:20,667 --> 00:34:22,669 Yeah, maybe for you, white boy. 467 00:34:22,712 --> 00:34:24,801 Me, they hang. 468 00:34:24,845 --> 00:34:27,195 Colonels first. 469 00:34:28,762 --> 00:34:31,721 I was out here for 12 hours. 470 00:34:31,765 --> 00:34:34,637 My toes are starting to hurt from standing. 471 00:34:38,598 --> 00:34:40,382 Stop it. 472 00:34:44,865 --> 00:34:47,737 Just act like you belong. Don't worry. I got this. 473 00:34:49,261 --> 00:34:51,393 Pick up that butt, soldier. Sorry, sir. 474 00:34:51,437 --> 00:34:54,527 And tuck that shirt in. Yes, sir. 475 00:34:54,570 --> 00:34:59,053 Get the door. Get the door. 476 00:34:59,097 --> 00:35:02,622 Thank you, Private. Don't get used to this. 477 00:35:30,040 --> 00:35:32,260 Whoo-hoo. Look at that. 478 00:35:36,917 --> 00:35:41,095 Enjoy your lunch, gentlemen. 479 00:35:41,139 --> 00:35:43,402 Okay, I'll be right back. 480 00:35:46,927 --> 00:35:49,799 Oh, your girlfriend, eleven o'clock. 481 00:35:51,149 --> 00:35:54,717 Oh. Darn it. 482 00:35:54,761 --> 00:35:57,111 The woman's a menace. 483 00:35:57,155 --> 00:36:00,723 Testing, one, two, one, two. One, one, one, one, two. 484 00:36:00,767 --> 00:36:04,336 This is deejay Harry Block here, and I'm an Aquarius. 485 00:36:04,379 --> 00:36:07,730 Harry, will you stop it? I can hear you. Don't you snap at me, 486 00:36:07,774 --> 00:36:10,472 unless you want an angry Solid Gold dancer on your hands. 487 00:36:12,126 --> 00:36:14,084 Lieutenant? 488 00:36:14,128 --> 00:36:17,262 Excuse me. Yeah? 489 00:36:17,305 --> 00:36:19,394 Who's that? 490 00:36:20,700 --> 00:36:22,789 I don't know. 491 00:36:24,747 --> 00:36:27,750 I don't have anything on my schedule. 492 00:36:27,794 --> 00:36:31,885 Maybe it's the guys from sector 12 doing a nocturnal specimen run. 493 00:36:31,928 --> 00:36:34,279 You know how those guys are. Oh, yeah. 494 00:36:40,676 --> 00:36:42,983 This place has changed. 495 00:36:52,340 --> 00:36:54,429 Oh, my God. 496 00:37:02,829 --> 00:37:06,746 Can you believe this? Harry, look at that. 497 00:37:21,717 --> 00:37:24,285 Our little babies are growing up. 498 00:37:30,857 --> 00:37:35,818 Three weeks, it's already like a rain forest in here. 499 00:37:35,862 --> 00:37:39,953 Ugh. Looks like the kitchen from my first apartment. 500 00:37:47,047 --> 00:37:51,443 Hey, Harry, check that guy out. 501 00:37:56,883 --> 00:37:58,972 Is it coming or going? 502 00:38:06,806 --> 00:38:08,851 The tree just ate it. 503 00:38:08,895 --> 00:38:11,376 Everything down here seems to be food for something else, 504 00:38:11,419 --> 00:38:14,988 so let's try to stay off the menu, huh? Got that right. 505 00:38:15,031 --> 00:38:18,034 Oops. 506 00:38:20,907 --> 00:38:23,562 Ira, come here. Look at these little things. 507 00:38:28,915 --> 00:38:32,875 Oh, cool. Hey, snag one. 508 00:38:32,919 --> 00:38:37,315 Snag one? Yeah. Snag one and put him in the bucket. 509 00:38:37,358 --> 00:38:41,493 I seen this movie. The black dude dies first. You snag it. 510 00:38:41,536 --> 00:38:43,669 Don't be scared. We came for a specimen, now snag one. 511 00:38:43,712 --> 00:38:46,454 Come on. It's not gonna hurt you. He's turned the other way. 512 00:38:46,498 --> 00:38:48,891 He's eating. 513 00:38:48,935 --> 00:38:52,895 Come on. Come on, my little red lobster. 514 00:38:52,939 --> 00:38:58,423 Come on, my sexy little crustacean. Come on. 515 00:38:58,466 --> 00:38:59,902 Whoa! Ohh! 516 00:39:05,647 --> 00:39:09,085 Ira, look at that backside. 517 00:39:09,129 --> 00:39:11,218 Theater in the round. 518 00:39:11,261 --> 00:39:13,916 That's the kind of trunk space you want in a late model car. 519 00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:16,702 Who does that remind you of? 520 00:39:16,745 --> 00:39:19,008 I have no idea what you're talking about. 521 00:39:19,052 --> 00:39:21,576 She's been throwing it at you enough. 522 00:39:21,620 --> 00:39:23,622 Dr. Reed? Bull's-eye. 523 00:39:23,665 --> 00:39:27,800 Excuse me, Dr. Reed. Did you authorize a walk-through? 524 00:39:27,843 --> 00:39:30,455 No. Why? 525 00:39:30,498 --> 00:39:33,762 Um, you should probably take a look at something. 526 00:39:33,806 --> 00:39:35,503 Here. 527 00:39:37,897 --> 00:39:39,942 That's the kind of rump you'd like to roast. 528 00:39:39,986 --> 00:39:42,945 Kind of mother you like to butter. That is a nice image. 529 00:39:42,989 --> 00:39:44,947 And I appreciate your assumption... 530 00:39:44,991 --> 00:39:47,776 that there is an actual sexual human being... 531 00:39:47,820 --> 00:39:52,738 underneath all Dr. Reed's deep-seated neuroses, but I don't think so. 532 00:39:52,781 --> 00:39:54,653 What? Yeah. 533 00:39:54,696 --> 00:39:57,743 I think she is a humorless ice queen. 534 00:39:57,786 --> 00:39:59,962 Ira, that's just a cover. Don't you know that? 535 00:40:00,006 --> 00:40:03,052 All she needs is a good humping. 536 00:40:03,096 --> 00:40:06,665 Oh, Ira. Ira! 537 00:40:06,708 --> 00:40:10,451 Ira! Stop that. We gotta get a piece of the asteroid. 538 00:40:10,495 --> 00:40:12,932 And cut that out. It disturbs me. 539 00:40:12,975 --> 00:40:14,934 Ira! Don't do that behind my back like that. 540 00:40:14,977 --> 00:40:16,979 I'm not doing it. Cut it out. 541 00:40:17,023 --> 00:40:19,242 Okay, I'm just walking. Ira! 542 00:40:25,031 --> 00:40:27,947 Let's bag that and get the hell out of here. 543 00:40:27,990 --> 00:40:29,949 I'm ready when you are, Colonel. 544 00:40:29,992 --> 00:40:34,649 This disco suit is making me chafe. 545 00:40:34,693 --> 00:40:37,739 Oh, shoo, fly! 546 00:40:37,783 --> 00:40:40,089 Hey, hold it right there. 547 00:40:42,483 --> 00:40:44,833 Dr. Reed, so nice to see you again. 548 00:40:44,877 --> 00:40:47,532 We were just leaving. You're in direct violation of the judge's orders. 549 00:40:47,575 --> 00:40:50,012 I could have you arrested right now. Wanna talk about violations? 550 00:40:50,056 --> 00:40:53,015 What about our lab? Anybody got a can of Raid? 551 00:40:53,059 --> 00:40:55,888 What are you talking about? You stole our computer hard drive, our samples, 552 00:40:55,931 --> 00:40:58,194 our files, everything. I didn't steal anything. 553 00:40:58,238 --> 00:41:01,023 Your buddies cleaned us out. Those guys right there. No, we didn't. 554 00:41:01,067 --> 00:41:05,158 Damn right. You've been trying to grab credit on our discovery. 555 00:41:05,201 --> 00:41:08,683 All we're trying to do is take back a piece of what's rightfully ours. 556 00:41:08,727 --> 00:41:11,817 I'm concerned with public safety. 557 00:41:11,860 --> 00:41:14,167 Is this true? Are you aware of any of this, Flemming? 558 00:41:14,210 --> 00:41:16,474 No. Absolutely not. Hey, there's something in my suit. 559 00:41:16,517 --> 00:41:19,041 Don't believe him! He admitted to hacking into our computer! 560 00:41:19,085 --> 00:41:21,653 There's something in my suit. Harry, what? 561 00:41:21,696 --> 00:41:23,916 Ira, there's something in my suit! 562 00:41:23,959 --> 00:41:26,571 That's impossible! It is sealed! 563 00:41:26,614 --> 00:41:30,052 The fly! There's a fly in my suit! 564 00:41:30,096 --> 00:41:33,055 Oh, God! Don't take off your helmet! 565 00:41:33,099 --> 00:41:35,231 Turn up the oxygen! It'll kill it! 566 00:41:39,061 --> 00:41:42,238 You see it? Look. Do you see it? 567 00:41:42,282 --> 00:41:45,067 No. You're all right. Okay. 568 00:41:45,111 --> 00:41:48,070 Who's the man? You're the man. I'm the man. 569 00:41:48,114 --> 00:41:50,072 You're the man.Okay. 570 00:41:50,116 --> 00:41:54,816 Oh, my God. 571 00:41:54,860 --> 00:41:57,558 It's in me! 572 00:41:57,602 --> 00:41:59,168 Harry! 573 00:42:02,650 --> 00:42:06,088 For the love of everything good and holy, get this goddamn thing out of me! 574 00:42:06,132 --> 00:42:08,700 You're gonna be okay, Harry. Cut him open! Let's get this thing! 575 00:42:08,743 --> 00:42:12,094 Cut me open? There goes your Christmas gift, Judas! 576 00:42:12,138 --> 00:42:14,706 It's moving down his leg. 577 00:42:14,749 --> 00:42:17,056 What do we do? We might have to amputate. 578 00:42:17,099 --> 00:42:19,798 Don't take the leg! Ira, don't let them take my leg! 579 00:42:19,841 --> 00:42:22,496 Is there anything else you can do? He thinks he's an athlete. 580 00:42:22,540 --> 00:42:23,628 Doctor, look.Ooh. 581 00:42:25,934 --> 00:42:30,809 It's heading for his testicles. Take it! Take the leg! 582 00:42:30,852 --> 00:42:34,029 Wait, wait! No, no, no, no! 583 00:42:34,073 --> 00:42:36,118 It's going the other way. Give me some forceps. 584 00:42:36,162 --> 00:42:39,121 I might be able to catch it in his colon. How are you going in? 585 00:42:39,165 --> 00:42:41,559 Rectally. Noooo! 586 00:42:41,602 --> 00:42:43,604 I'll get lubricant. There's no time for lubricant. 587 00:42:43,648 --> 00:42:47,303 There's always time for lubricant! All right, flip him! 588 00:42:47,347 --> 00:42:49,654 Okay, here we go. 589 00:42:49,697 --> 00:42:51,960 Try to relax, buddy. It's gonna be okay. 590 00:42:52,004 --> 00:42:54,659 I'll shove this gurney up your ass! See if you relax! 591 00:42:54,702 --> 00:42:58,532 Cheek spreader. All right. I'm going in. 592 00:43:01,187 --> 00:43:03,319 Don't clench. Don't clench. You're so brave. 593 00:43:03,363 --> 00:43:05,539 You're so brave. A little more. 594 00:43:05,583 --> 00:43:08,150 No more! A little deeper. 595 00:43:08,194 --> 00:43:11,806 No... deeper! Squeeze my hand. Squeeze it! 596 00:43:11,850 --> 00:43:14,156 Almost there. Open up. Breathe. 597 00:43:14,200 --> 00:43:16,681 Breathe. I'm breathing! 598 00:43:16,724 --> 00:43:19,161 Almost there. You're there! 599 00:43:19,205 --> 00:43:22,034 Ohh! 600 00:43:22,077 --> 00:43:26,429 It's over, it's over. 601 00:43:26,473 --> 00:43:28,649 It just died. 602 00:43:28,693 --> 00:43:32,305 Don't you ever do that again! 603 00:43:35,613 --> 00:43:38,877 Should've seen that thing. It was like this! You took it like a man. 604 00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:42,184 You're all right. You did great. Can we get you anything? 605 00:43:42,228 --> 00:43:47,363 Ice cream. I'd like an ice cream, please. What flavor? 606 00:43:47,407 --> 00:43:51,367 Doesn't matter. It's for my ass. 607 00:44:03,815 --> 00:44:08,036 Man! Now I'm a Hawaiian warrior? 608 00:44:08,080 --> 00:44:12,127 You know, I'm thinking seriously about moving maybe down to California. 609 00:44:12,171 --> 00:44:14,564 Start over. Because of the fireman thing? 610 00:44:14,608 --> 00:44:16,610 Big deal. You flunked out. 611 00:44:16,654 --> 00:44:20,527 You know how many times I've flunked in my life? A ton. 612 00:44:20,570 --> 00:44:23,748 Hey, pool boy, you watering down the mai tais? 613 00:44:23,791 --> 00:44:29,144 No, sir, but let me fix you something special. 614 00:44:29,188 --> 00:44:33,105 'Cause you're nothing but a big, fat monkey turd. 615 00:44:33,148 --> 00:44:35,934 Excuse me? What? 616 00:44:35,977 --> 00:44:37,979 Your drink's almost ready. 617 00:44:40,286 --> 00:44:43,332 Here you go. That should tide you over. 618 00:45:12,884 --> 00:45:17,584 Damn it! 619 00:45:17,627 --> 00:45:23,329 That's gonna stain. 620 00:45:38,300 --> 00:45:40,302 Barry! 621 00:45:40,346 --> 00:45:43,436 Barry, where are you? I can't see you. 622 00:45:43,479 --> 00:45:45,438 Where are you? 623 00:45:45,481 --> 00:45:48,006 I'm down here, my pet, by the water. 624 00:45:53,925 --> 00:45:56,492 No! 625 00:46:15,729 --> 00:46:19,385 Something just ate Barry Cartwright! 626 00:46:21,430 --> 00:46:24,303 Oh. That's too bad. 627 00:46:29,395 --> 00:46:33,355 I don't get it. How does someone with your background, 628 00:46:33,399 --> 00:46:35,923 credentials and talent... 629 00:46:35,967 --> 00:46:40,319 end up... like you? 630 00:46:40,362 --> 00:46:42,538 Thank you. 631 00:46:42,582 --> 00:46:45,411 Your partner could've died. What were you thinking? 632 00:46:45,454 --> 00:46:48,370 I was desperate. 633 00:46:48,414 --> 00:46:50,459 I've been exiled out here in Arizona for five years... 634 00:46:50,503 --> 00:46:52,548 watching the world pass me by, 635 00:46:52,592 --> 00:46:55,290 and this amazing discovery literally falls into my lap. 636 00:46:55,334 --> 00:46:57,336 I look at it as my ticket out of here. 637 00:47:00,774 --> 00:47:03,646 But I don't suppose that you would understand that. 638 00:47:03,690 --> 00:47:05,779 Oh, no, how could I? 639 00:47:05,823 --> 00:47:09,957 I'm just a humorless ice maiden in desperate need of a good humping. 640 00:47:12,655 --> 00:47:16,398 You heard that, huh? Loud and clear. 641 00:47:16,442 --> 00:47:20,881 Don't think you know so much about me. You don't. 642 00:47:20,925 --> 00:47:22,840 I'm sure I don't. 643 00:47:25,451 --> 00:47:27,975 Thank you for not calling the cops. 644 00:47:36,462 --> 00:47:39,160 Ohh! Ohh! 645 00:47:39,204 --> 00:47:42,076 Be careful! Stop being such a baby. 646 00:47:45,471 --> 00:47:48,735 We've seen that car before. 647 00:47:48,778 --> 00:47:53,479 No more bran for me. 648 00:47:53,522 --> 00:47:55,481 Hey, girls. 649 00:47:55,524 --> 00:47:58,049 Hey. 650 00:48:03,184 --> 00:48:05,447 Cut it out. 651 00:48:05,491 --> 00:48:07,536 Hey, it's the meteor guy. 652 00:48:07,580 --> 00:48:09,799 What's in the bag, your blow-up doll? 653 00:48:09,843 --> 00:48:14,195 Oh, no. I got something that you're really gonna like. 654 00:48:14,239 --> 00:48:17,024 What happened to you? Shut up. 655 00:48:18,504 --> 00:48:21,681 You guys teach here? Yeah. 656 00:48:21,724 --> 00:48:24,031 I was thinking about taking some classes, 657 00:48:24,075 --> 00:48:28,383 but I decided to hit the job market early and get a jump-start on things. 658 00:48:29,994 --> 00:48:31,952 Can we help you? 659 00:48:31,996 --> 00:48:36,261 Yeah. A guy got killed at my country club last night. 660 00:48:36,304 --> 00:48:42,615 A real douche bag, but that just doesn't make it right, you know? 661 00:48:42,658 --> 00:48:45,052 It was an animal attack. 662 00:48:49,187 --> 00:48:51,493 Isn't that something? 663 00:48:51,537 --> 00:48:53,669 It happened by the water hazard on the fourth green. 664 00:48:53,713 --> 00:48:56,411 The lady he was banging saw the whole thing. 665 00:48:56,455 --> 00:48:58,413 Anyhow, we chased this sucker on the fairway, 666 00:48:58,457 --> 00:49:00,676 and then it died in a sand trap. 667 00:49:00,720 --> 00:49:04,289 It just died? How? 668 00:49:04,332 --> 00:49:07,466 Like it was choking to death. 669 00:49:07,509 --> 00:49:10,121 You know? Stopped breathing. 670 00:49:10,164 --> 00:49:12,993 Anyway, it's like nothing I ever saw before. 671 00:49:13,037 --> 00:49:16,040 I thought you guys might want to take a look at it. 672 00:49:29,444 --> 00:49:32,491 Jill, you've got some kind of infestation here. 673 00:49:32,534 --> 00:49:34,275 Huh? 674 00:49:34,319 --> 00:49:37,931 You have a serious bug problem. 675 00:49:37,975 --> 00:49:39,715 What? 676 00:49:44,329 --> 00:49:50,335 Jill, there's-- there's something in your closet. 677 00:49:52,467 --> 00:49:54,426 Open the door, Grace. 678 00:49:54,469 --> 00:49:56,471 Me? It's your house. 679 00:50:11,747 --> 00:50:15,969 Oh. 680 00:50:16,013 --> 00:50:20,756 Hey, when did you guys get a dog? 681 00:50:22,541 --> 00:50:25,935 We don't have a damn dog. 682 00:50:25,979 --> 00:50:30,070 I don't think that's a dog. It's like some kind of rodent. 683 00:50:30,114 --> 00:50:33,508 Or a muskrat or pig. 684 00:50:33,552 --> 00:50:35,728 Well, how the hell did it get in here? 685 00:50:35,771 --> 00:50:38,600 Doesn't look too healthy, does it? 686 00:50:38,644 --> 00:50:40,820 Well, it's frightened. 687 00:50:40,863 --> 00:50:46,521 Look. He can barely breathe, he's so scared. 688 00:50:46,565 --> 00:50:51,526 Come on, cutie pie. Uh-huh. Don't be afraid. 689 00:50:51,570 --> 00:50:54,399 Come on. That's a good boy. 690 00:51:03,799 --> 00:51:07,412 Yes, yes. 911? 691 00:51:21,469 --> 00:51:24,429 What the hell is that thing? 692 00:51:30,261 --> 00:51:33,002 Thanks. Um, 693 00:51:33,046 --> 00:51:34,743 pick me up in an hour. 694 00:51:34,787 --> 00:51:38,834 No, two. Oh, like an hour and a half will be good. 695 00:51:43,187 --> 00:51:45,232 Thanks. 696 00:51:53,501 --> 00:51:55,851 Hi. Do you have any messages for me? 697 00:51:59,246 --> 00:52:02,684 Two single beds, please. We're fighting. 698 00:52:02,728 --> 00:52:06,471 Ira, come on. I'm tired. I've had, like, two hours of sleep. 699 00:52:06,514 --> 00:52:09,082 I gotta go take a shower. They're spreading. 700 00:52:09,126 --> 00:52:11,911 You're talking about the golf course? We're all over it. 701 00:52:11,954 --> 00:52:14,479 Woodman sent a team out there two hours ago. 702 00:52:14,522 --> 00:52:18,483 Well, it's too bad you missed the five-foot amphibian that's lying dead in my lab. 703 00:52:18,526 --> 00:52:21,268 They're adapting. We got to shut it down. 704 00:52:21,312 --> 00:52:25,185 No, you're overreacting. We can handle this. 705 00:52:25,229 --> 00:52:27,187 I used to be arrogant like you. 706 00:52:27,231 --> 00:52:30,930 We're both aware of what that led to. 707 00:52:30,973 --> 00:52:34,020 Take me seriously, Allison. 708 00:52:34,063 --> 00:52:37,676 I do take you seriously. 709 00:52:37,719 --> 00:52:41,201 Then you got to talk to Woodman because he won't listen to me. 710 00:52:41,245 --> 00:52:46,772 We got to kill these things while we still can. 711 00:52:46,815 --> 00:52:50,428 All right. I'll discuss it with him, but I can't promise you anything. 712 00:52:50,471 --> 00:52:52,691 Thank you. Okay. 713 00:52:52,734 --> 00:52:56,303 Oh, justone more thing. Yeah. 714 00:52:56,347 --> 00:52:59,263 Do you think you could ever be attracted to me? 715 00:53:01,526 --> 00:53:04,485 Bye, Ira. Just food for thought. 716 00:53:11,100 --> 00:53:13,668 Yeah. She's mine. 717 00:53:16,802 --> 00:53:19,152 I've been an adjunct professor for going on four years now, 718 00:53:19,196 --> 00:53:21,763 but I'm hoping this whole alien brouhaha... 719 00:53:21,807 --> 00:53:25,332 will net me an honorary doctorate somewhere. 720 00:53:25,376 --> 00:53:28,509 You gonna finish that bacon? 721 00:53:28,553 --> 00:53:31,773 Yeah, I'm gonna finish it. I ordered it, didn't I? 722 00:53:31,817 --> 00:53:35,255 So, um, about the coaching-- girls volleyball? 723 00:53:35,299 --> 00:53:37,257 Mm-hmm. 724 00:53:37,301 --> 00:53:39,738 Do you ever get to see them take showers? 725 00:53:39,781 --> 00:53:43,785 Yeah. All the time. Sometimes I shower with them. 726 00:53:43,829 --> 00:53:46,135 You're kidding me, right? Hey. 727 00:53:46,179 --> 00:53:48,529 So? She's gonna talk to Woodman. 728 00:53:48,573 --> 00:53:50,836 Ah. Thank goodness. Coffee? Thank you. 729 00:53:50,879 --> 00:53:54,709 Mm. I'm okay. 730 00:53:54,753 --> 00:53:56,929 So level with me, fellas. 731 00:53:56,972 --> 00:54:02,326 Is there some sort of alien... attack happening here? 732 00:54:02,369 --> 00:54:04,328 We don't know. 733 00:54:07,853 --> 00:54:10,029 Excuse me. Can I borrow your cream? 734 00:54:11,639 --> 00:54:13,598 Hi, Denise. Hello, Ira. 735 00:54:13,641 --> 00:54:17,776 Still setting the world on fire? Ow. 736 00:54:17,819 --> 00:54:20,387 That's Ira's ex over there sitting with the cop. 737 00:54:20,431 --> 00:54:23,956 What's with the police escort? You're not under arrest? I don't see any handcuffs. 738 00:54:23,999 --> 00:54:26,828 That's funny. This is my friend, Sam. 739 00:54:26,872 --> 00:54:29,004 He's about to make detective. I know Sam. We go way back. 740 00:54:29,048 --> 00:54:30,963 Hey, congratulations, Sam. 741 00:54:31,006 --> 00:54:33,313 Maybe you can look into what happened to my missing shirts. 742 00:54:33,357 --> 00:54:35,402 Did I tell you about that? She walked out with, like, two or three of my shirts. 743 00:54:35,446 --> 00:54:40,233 I mean, is it-- I'm not up on the law, you know, like law enforcement, 744 00:54:40,277 --> 00:54:44,368 but is it against the law when you walk out of somebody's house... 745 00:54:44,411 --> 00:54:46,413 with what they own? You want your shirt? 746 00:54:46,457 --> 00:54:48,981 Seriously, take it. No, no, no. Oh, come on. 747 00:54:49,024 --> 00:54:51,592 You must be cold, right? Are you cold? Is that it? 748 00:54:51,636 --> 00:54:55,248 Why should I get to wear the shirt when it's your shirt? 749 00:54:55,292 --> 00:54:58,817 It's amazing how many women just-- They open their shirt to him. 750 00:54:58,860 --> 00:55:00,949 I'm sure he'll let you borrow the shirt for just today. 751 00:55:00,993 --> 00:55:02,908 Isn't that right, Professor? Uh-- 752 00:55:02,951 --> 00:55:05,998 We have a code 1272 over in Valley Vista. 753 00:55:06,041 --> 00:55:09,871 1272? That's an animal attack. 754 00:55:09,915 --> 00:55:12,831 1099 responding. Got to go, babe. 755 00:55:12,874 --> 00:55:15,137 Now? They're calling. 756 00:55:15,181 --> 00:55:19,054 Wait. Be careful out there. 757 00:55:19,098 --> 00:55:21,535 Oh, you'll take care of the check, right? 758 00:55:21,579 --> 00:55:24,016 Yeah. 759 00:55:29,935 --> 00:55:33,417 Hey, I want those shirts back, Denise. 760 00:55:33,460 --> 00:55:36,594 Hey, you got to admit, 761 00:55:36,637 --> 00:55:40,902 this animal attack has kind of an ominous feel to it, doesn't it? 762 00:55:40,946 --> 00:55:43,078 Check it out? Check it out. 763 00:55:43,122 --> 00:55:45,080 All right! 764 00:55:57,528 --> 00:55:59,921 All right, looks like we're under the microscope here, 765 00:55:59,965 --> 00:56:02,315 so let's be very systematic and subtle in what we do. 766 00:56:02,359 --> 00:56:04,273 No cowboy stuff, okay? No problem. 767 00:56:04,317 --> 00:56:07,581 Professionals. Officer Johnson. 768 00:56:07,625 --> 00:56:09,931 All right, fellas, what are you doing here? 769 00:56:09,975 --> 00:56:12,543 We heard about the animal attack. And part of our job... 770 00:56:12,586 --> 00:56:15,937 at the college and state health department is to ascertain if there's any health risk here. 771 00:56:15,981 --> 00:56:19,463 Okay, you know what? No. Not this time. Forget about it. 772 00:56:19,506 --> 00:56:21,943 You didn't touch it with your bare hands? That would be a serious no-no. 773 00:56:21,987 --> 00:56:25,947 You did? He touched it. He shouldn't have touched it. 774 00:56:25,991 --> 00:56:27,949 What do we do? I don't know. He shouldn't have touched it. 775 00:56:27,993 --> 00:56:31,388 Okay, why don't you guys come on in and take a look? 776 00:56:31,431 --> 00:56:36,088 I'll be checking things out around here in this vicinity. 777 00:56:41,049 --> 00:56:43,661 Ooh! Ooh. 778 00:56:43,704 --> 00:56:46,533 This dog is all ass. 779 00:56:46,577 --> 00:56:49,623 Ira, look at this, man. 780 00:56:52,496 --> 00:56:54,976 He would've come from in here, right? 781 00:56:55,020 --> 00:56:57,762 It's just used for storage and access under the house. 782 00:57:04,116 --> 00:57:06,466 Looks like he crawled right through the dirt right there. 783 00:57:09,208 --> 00:57:11,166 Hey, guys. 784 00:57:11,210 --> 00:57:14,996 I was, uh, conducting a parameter check, 785 00:57:15,040 --> 00:57:17,608 and, uh, there's something you better see. 786 00:57:17,651 --> 00:57:20,480 If you guys liked that thing, you're gonna love this. 787 00:57:20,524 --> 00:57:23,004 What is it? 788 00:57:23,048 --> 00:57:24,745 What is it? 789 00:57:27,444 --> 00:57:30,490 Oh! Oh! 790 00:57:33,450 --> 00:57:37,802 Great googa-mooga! What did I tell you? 791 00:57:40,065 --> 00:57:42,415 See, they're crawling out. 792 00:57:42,459 --> 00:57:47,333 They're trying to breathe in our atmosphere. 793 00:57:47,376 --> 00:57:53,121 Fortunately, they haven't been able to adapt yet. 794 00:57:53,165 --> 00:57:55,123 Hey, Ira. Yeah? 795 00:57:55,167 --> 00:57:57,125 I think I know how these things got here. 796 00:57:57,169 --> 00:57:59,519 How? 797 00:57:59,563 --> 00:58:04,742 Well, this entire area is just a honeycomb of caves and old mine shafts. 798 00:58:04,785 --> 00:58:07,571 If memory serves, the Moenave cave system... 799 00:58:07,614 --> 00:58:09,616 starts just a few miles from here. 800 00:58:09,660 --> 00:58:12,053 It's west of the golf course. Runs into the foothills, 801 00:58:12,097 --> 00:58:16,928 continues down to the Kaibab Plateau and goes right into Lake Powell. 802 00:58:18,146 --> 00:58:20,845 Our cave... 803 00:58:20,888 --> 00:58:23,369 is smack dab in the middle of the system. 804 00:58:23,412 --> 00:58:25,023 It's all connected. 805 00:58:27,112 --> 00:58:29,984 Could you repeat that? I'm impressed. 806 00:58:30,028 --> 00:58:34,728 Hey, beneath this calm, sexy exterior beats the heart of a true scientist. 807 00:58:34,772 --> 00:58:37,601 Whoa, guys. That one's moving. 808 00:58:42,475 --> 00:58:44,869 What the hell is it doing? 809 00:58:48,612 --> 00:58:50,265 I think it's trying to breathe. 810 00:58:59,840 --> 00:59:02,756 Oh! That's like a big loogie. 811 00:59:20,034 --> 00:59:21,906 Mazel tov. It's a boy. 812 00:59:25,039 --> 00:59:27,215 It's oxygen tolerant. 813 00:59:36,137 --> 00:59:38,139 It's flying away. Is that a bad thing? 814 00:59:38,183 --> 00:59:40,751 Only if you're a human being. 815 00:59:42,666 --> 00:59:45,146 You know how much I hate shopping. 816 00:59:45,190 --> 00:59:48,889 We need to find you something nice for Thanksgiving. I've got enough clothes. 817 00:59:51,413 --> 00:59:54,155 Tony, I think that color's great on you. 818 00:59:54,199 --> 00:59:56,897 Whoa! 819 01:00:28,973 --> 01:00:30,757 I think this might be the place. 820 01:00:39,679 --> 01:00:41,768 You ever used one of these before? 821 01:00:41,812 --> 01:00:44,205 Just 'cause I'm a schoolteacher don't make me a pussy. 822 01:00:44,249 --> 01:00:49,210 Hey, ladies, there's a flying extraterrestrial in the store. Can we focus? 823 01:00:57,741 --> 01:01:00,221 I'm in here. Just a minute. 824 01:01:02,920 --> 01:01:05,096 Just a second, please. 825 01:01:05,139 --> 01:01:08,273 I said just a second! 826 01:01:08,316 --> 01:01:10,667 Bitch! 827 01:01:10,710 --> 01:01:13,408 How would you like me... 828 01:01:13,452 --> 01:01:16,542 to scratch the eyes out of your skull? 829 01:01:43,743 --> 01:01:47,442 Here, birdie, birdie, birdie, birdie, birdie, birdie! 830 01:01:47,486 --> 01:01:49,706 Birdie! 831 01:01:49,749 --> 01:01:51,795 Ca-ca-ca-ca- ca-ca-ca-caw! 832 01:01:51,838 --> 01:01:54,798 Ca-caw! Ca-caw! 833 01:01:54,841 --> 01:01:57,148 Ca-caw. 834 01:01:57,191 --> 01:01:59,454 All right. 835 01:01:59,498 --> 01:02:02,849 If I was a giant, nasty alien bird in a department store, 836 01:02:02,893 --> 01:02:04,851 where would I be? 837 01:02:04,895 --> 01:02:07,114 Lingerie. Not you. The bird. 838 01:02:07,158 --> 01:02:08,942 Lingerie. 839 01:02:12,293 --> 01:02:13,817 Help! 840 01:02:33,358 --> 01:02:36,883 You go low. I'm going high. Got it. 841 01:02:58,775 --> 01:03:00,733 We're never gonna find this damn thing. 842 01:03:00,777 --> 01:03:06,347 I lost him! How do you lose a 20-foot bird in a mall? 843 01:03:06,391 --> 01:03:10,221 Ira, I don't know. 844 01:03:10,264 --> 01:03:13,833 So what do we do now? 845 01:03:13,877 --> 01:03:18,403 Ca-caw. 846 01:03:18,446 --> 01:03:21,362 Ca-caw. Ca-caw. 847 01:03:21,406 --> 01:03:26,367 Tookie-tookie! Ca-caw! Ca-caw! Ca-ca-caw! Wayne. 848 01:03:26,411 --> 01:03:28,326 I think we've established... 849 01:03:28,369 --> 01:03:31,895 that "ca-caw, ca-caw" and "tookie-tookie" don't work. 850 01:03:31,938 --> 01:03:34,941 Right. Sorry. 851 01:03:34,985 --> 01:03:38,118 All right, so what do you say, Ira? Pack it in? 852 01:03:46,344 --> 01:03:49,390 Step back, Harry. I'm gonna shoot him. 853 01:03:49,434 --> 01:03:53,046 No. Stand down. I'm gonna kill this one myself. 854 01:03:53,090 --> 01:03:55,962 Give me a chance. I'm communicating here. 855 01:04:04,579 --> 01:04:06,712 Because you're embarrassing me. 856 01:04:29,082 --> 01:04:33,913 It's working.Yeah. Sing. Sing. Rub some funk on it. 857 01:04:43,270 --> 01:04:49,973 Here he comes. Grab the girl. I'm gonna get the bird. Got it. 858 01:05:07,686 --> 01:05:11,211 Yeah! 859 01:05:15,433 --> 01:05:17,435 Oh, my God! 860 01:05:17,478 --> 01:05:19,437 All right! Nice shot! 861 01:05:19,480 --> 01:05:21,656 I am so sorry. I promise. 862 01:05:21,700 --> 01:05:25,878 I swear to God I will never shoplift again. 863 01:05:25,922 --> 01:05:27,706 Good. 864 01:05:37,542 --> 01:05:41,067 So what do you want, light meat or dark? 865 01:05:41,111 --> 01:05:44,244 You have to ask? 866 01:05:49,423 --> 01:05:52,426 It's dead now. Yep. 867 01:06:36,601 --> 01:06:39,560 I'm standing at the edge of the Valley Vista housing community... 868 01:06:39,604 --> 01:06:45,349 where just below me there are dozens of giant odd-looking dead creatures. 869 01:06:45,392 --> 01:06:47,351 Now, we should stress to our viewers... 870 01:06:47,394 --> 01:06:49,744 that to this point, we have received no official word-- 871 01:06:49,788 --> 01:06:52,704 All that I saw was this ugly tentacle thing come out of the ground... 872 01:06:52,747 --> 01:06:55,272 and tried to grab my private parts. 873 01:06:55,315 --> 01:06:57,578 I batted it away. It got my hand. 874 01:06:57,622 --> 01:07:00,668 ...of anxiety and confusion in the greater Glen Canyon area. 875 01:07:00,712 --> 01:07:03,541 And so we stand outside the state capitol building, 876 01:07:03,584 --> 01:07:06,326 awaiting any comment from the governor's office... 877 01:07:06,370 --> 01:07:11,157 concerning the nature and origin of these extraordinary creatures. 878 01:07:24,518 --> 01:07:27,217 Governor Lewis, this way. 879 01:07:27,260 --> 01:07:29,349 Can somebody here tell me why I was not informed... 880 01:07:29,393 --> 01:07:32,396 that we have goddamn aliens crawling all over my beloved state? 881 01:07:32,439 --> 01:07:35,616 Right now I've got 400 meat-picking media vultures camped outside my office. 882 01:07:35,660 --> 01:07:38,010 They know more about this thing than I do. 883 01:07:38,054 --> 01:07:41,361 Now, I ought to throw the whole goddamn, jacked-up bunch of you in prison. 884 01:07:41,405 --> 01:07:44,016 Not that cushy federal place with the loose jumpsuits. 885 01:07:44,060 --> 01:07:46,105 State prison with the crotch binders. 886 01:07:46,149 --> 01:07:48,412 I'm terribly sorry, Governor, 887 01:07:48,455 --> 01:07:51,458 but there were some earlier security breaches made by Dr. Kane and his team. 888 01:07:51,502 --> 01:07:53,982 Wait a minute. Excuse me. We thought it best to keep the lid on the situation... 889 01:07:54,026 --> 01:07:56,072 in the interest of national security. That is not exactly true. 890 01:07:56,115 --> 01:07:59,858 I believe the governor's question was directed at me, Dr. Reed. 891 01:07:59,901 --> 01:08:02,643 Okay, put a plug in it. I'm not interested in your bureaucratic crapola. 892 01:08:02,687 --> 01:08:05,690 What I really wanna know is how bad this thing is. 893 01:08:05,733 --> 01:08:08,040 It's bad, Governor. 894 01:08:08,084 --> 01:08:12,653 Now, according to the new ground sensors and the satellite thermal scans, 895 01:08:12,697 --> 01:08:15,482 they indicate a potential problem. 896 01:08:15,526 --> 01:08:18,268 I don't know how to read all this. What kind of a problem? 897 01:08:18,311 --> 01:08:21,836 Now, somebody, please take this ugly bag of snakes and lay 'em out straight for me. 898 01:08:21,880 --> 01:08:23,838 Now, please, allow me. And you are? 899 01:08:23,882 --> 01:08:28,104 Dr. Allison Reed. How do you do? Carla, would you mind? 900 01:08:28,147 --> 01:08:31,672 Okay, the red markings in these projections... 901 01:08:31,716 --> 01:08:33,544 indicate the growth of the alien ecosystem. 902 01:08:36,286 --> 01:08:38,853 Unless we do something immediately, 903 01:08:38,897 --> 01:08:41,595 we will lose Glen Canyon in three days. 904 01:08:41,639 --> 01:08:43,119 Great merciful Christ. 905 01:08:43,162 --> 01:08:47,123 In a week, the rest of Arizona. 906 01:08:47,166 --> 01:08:49,690 Then the entire southwest. 907 01:08:49,734 --> 01:08:53,955 In two months, the United States officially belongs to them. 908 01:08:53,999 --> 01:08:56,219 And we are extinct. 909 01:08:56,262 --> 01:08:58,264 You got to be shitting me. 910 01:09:03,922 --> 01:09:07,143 Come on. Admit it. You're glad to see us. Huh? 911 01:09:07,186 --> 01:09:09,971 I, for one, am glad to see you. Call the M.P.'s. Have these men arrested. 912 01:09:10,015 --> 01:09:13,192 Hey, we just blew a giant alien bird out of a department store. 913 01:09:13,236 --> 01:09:15,151 We're covering up your mess. 914 01:09:15,194 --> 01:09:17,718 Governor, Dr. Ira Kane. I'm the chairman... 915 01:09:17,762 --> 01:09:20,112 of the science department at the Glen Canyon Community College. 916 01:09:20,156 --> 01:09:23,985 This is my associate. Harry Phineas Block, adjunct professor of geology. 917 01:09:24,029 --> 01:09:26,945 Voted for you. Wayne Grey. 918 01:09:26,988 --> 01:09:31,515 I took some chemistry in high school. 919 01:09:31,558 --> 01:09:34,082 Now, you two gentlemen are the original discoverers of the phenomena. 920 01:09:34,126 --> 01:09:36,476 Yes, sir. That's correct. 921 01:09:36,520 --> 01:09:39,305 Yes, they are, and they're also responsible for the mess we're in right now. 922 01:09:39,349 --> 01:09:41,351 What? Here we go. 923 01:09:41,394 --> 01:09:44,528 They broke into the contained area and breached our safety procedures. 924 01:09:44,571 --> 01:09:47,748 Unwittingly causing the dissemination of alien organisms outside the secured area. 925 01:09:47,792 --> 01:09:51,491 Liar, liar, pants on fire! Criminal charges are in order here! 926 01:09:51,535 --> 01:09:54,755 This is bullshit! Shut up, all of you! Listen. 927 01:09:54,799 --> 01:09:57,715 My state out there is being overrun by vicious aliens. 928 01:09:57,758 --> 01:09:59,760 Now, you're all supposed to be the experts. 929 01:09:59,804 --> 01:10:02,154 I wanna know right now and I wanna know it quick. 930 01:10:02,198 --> 01:10:04,330 How the hell are you supposed to deal with this? 931 01:10:04,374 --> 01:10:09,901 This is an outline of the infected area as of this afternoon. 932 01:10:09,944 --> 01:10:12,773 Now, Governor, my plan is to evacuate everyone... 933 01:10:12,817 --> 01:10:15,254 from within five miles of the perimeter. 934 01:10:15,298 --> 01:10:17,778 Evacuation? You're talking about 10,000 people. 935 01:10:17,822 --> 01:10:20,738 Yes, sir. We evacuate, make it safe... 936 01:10:20,781 --> 01:10:23,828 and then we burn the alien menace right the hell out of there. 937 01:10:23,871 --> 01:10:26,526 With what? 938 01:10:26,570 --> 01:10:30,008 With napalm. Lots and lots of napalm. 939 01:10:30,051 --> 01:10:32,837 Napalm? Why don't you just nuke 'em while you're at it? 940 01:10:32,880 --> 01:10:35,796 What about nukes? 941 01:10:35,840 --> 01:10:38,582 Pull your horns in there, boys. Nobody's dropping an H-bomb on my state. 942 01:10:38,625 --> 01:10:42,238 All this talk about napalm and burning things makes me very damn nervous. 943 01:10:42,281 --> 01:10:45,806 Well, it should. We have no idea how they'd react to such an attack on a cellular level. 944 01:10:45,850 --> 01:10:50,158 Governor, it is time for a military solution. This will work. 945 01:10:50,202 --> 01:10:53,336 What? Sorry to interrupt. You better take a look at this. 946 01:10:53,379 --> 01:10:55,990 What? 947 01:10:56,034 --> 01:10:58,819 Clear out. 948 01:10:58,863 --> 01:11:01,213 Right away, sir. What? 949 01:11:01,257 --> 01:11:03,215 What, you called me out for this? 950 01:11:03,259 --> 01:11:07,175 Sir, one of the creatures just destroyed video four. 951 01:11:07,219 --> 01:11:11,832 What's going on down there? 952 01:11:11,876 --> 01:11:16,010 My God. They've evolved into primates. 953 01:11:16,054 --> 01:11:19,275 Oh! Now, that's a face for radio. 954 01:11:26,369 --> 01:11:28,022 Whoa! 955 01:11:33,071 --> 01:11:35,987 They just took out six and seven. 956 01:11:36,030 --> 01:11:39,860 All the monitors are down. Well, that can't be good. 957 01:11:39,904 --> 01:11:42,428 That's the elevator. 958 01:11:42,472 --> 01:11:45,779 We have no personnel down there. 959 01:11:45,823 --> 01:11:48,260 They breached the air lock. 960 01:11:48,304 --> 01:11:52,612 What, the fuzzy no-nose chimp? Call for backup. 961 01:11:59,837 --> 01:12:02,013 They're coming through the elevator! 962 01:12:02,056 --> 01:12:06,452 Cover the elevator! Just stay back behind me! Stay back behind me! 963 01:12:06,496 --> 01:12:08,846 Get the hell off me! I wanna see this thing! 964 01:12:14,330 --> 01:12:16,114 Be prepared to fire. 965 01:12:31,651 --> 01:12:34,480 It's empty, sir. 966 01:12:49,060 --> 01:12:51,889 The governor! The governor! Don't shoot! 967 01:12:51,932 --> 01:12:54,065 Help me! 968 01:13:02,943 --> 01:13:06,294 Somebody do something! Hold your fire. Hold your fire. 969 01:13:06,338 --> 01:13:07,252 You're gonna get somebody killed. 970 01:13:31,581 --> 01:13:35,759 Nice shot. I'll take that now. 971 01:13:40,938 --> 01:13:43,157 General, you have my full support... 972 01:13:43,201 --> 01:13:45,986 to do whatever you need to do, however much firepower it takes. 973 01:13:46,030 --> 01:13:48,293 You can melt the whole place down to beaded glass... 974 01:13:48,336 --> 01:13:50,295 if that's what it takes. 975 01:13:50,338 --> 01:13:54,168 Just get these hell-blown creazoids out of my state. Thank you, Governor. 976 01:13:54,212 --> 01:13:56,997 I'll be ready to go by noon tomorrow. Good, sir. 977 01:13:57,041 --> 01:14:00,305 Where have you two been? I was just getting out of the way. 978 01:14:00,348 --> 01:14:02,525 Get me out of here! 979 01:14:02,568 --> 01:14:05,223 Science project's over. 980 01:14:05,266 --> 01:14:08,487 I want you and your people gone. 981 01:14:08,531 --> 01:14:17,757 Soldier, escort these men out. Yes, sir. 982 01:14:17,801 --> 01:14:20,978 Don't you have work to do? 983 01:14:21,021 --> 01:14:22,980 You are such an asshole. 984 01:14:26,897 --> 01:14:29,987 You know, when a woman expresses anger, it's often because-- 985 01:14:30,030 --> 01:14:32,380 Shut up, Flemming. Shut up. 986 01:14:32,424 --> 01:14:37,603 Okay, okay. I know where the car is. 987 01:14:38,778 --> 01:14:40,737 Wipe my ass too? 988 01:14:40,780 --> 01:14:42,782 Hey, guys! 989 01:14:44,436 --> 01:14:46,525 Got room for one more? 990 01:14:46,569 --> 01:14:48,788 Hell, yeah. 991 01:14:48,832 --> 01:14:52,052 Who wants to be deputy director of the C.D.C. anyway? 992 01:14:52,096 --> 01:14:55,621 The real money's in the private sector. 993 01:14:55,665 --> 01:14:59,016 Are you sure about this? Oh, yeah. 994 01:14:59,059 --> 01:15:01,192 Uh, listen. It may not seem like much now, 995 01:15:01,235 --> 01:15:06,023 but I managed to get your research files and your original samples. 996 01:15:06,066 --> 01:15:11,158 So, if we survive this, you guys will get the credit. 997 01:15:15,119 --> 01:15:17,643 Thank you. No. Thank-- No, it's nothing. 998 01:15:17,687 --> 01:15:19,645 Let me get it. No. I got it. 999 01:15:19,689 --> 01:15:23,040 All right. 1000 01:15:23,083 --> 01:15:25,259 Ooh! 1001 01:15:25,303 --> 01:15:29,046 Sorry. Excuse me. We haven't been formally introduced yet. 1002 01:15:29,089 --> 01:15:31,831 I'm Wayne Grey. Oh, hey, I'm kind of with him. 1003 01:15:31,875 --> 01:15:36,096 Oh. That's cool. 1004 01:15:36,140 --> 01:15:39,056 Buckle up, Allison. We're rolling.Okay. Oh, my goodness! 1005 01:15:43,103 --> 01:15:46,890 Facilities are being provided for you and your family. 1006 01:15:46,933 --> 01:15:50,110 Please move in an orderly fashion. 1007 01:15:58,249 --> 01:16:01,034 They're gonna blow up the whole town. 1008 01:16:01,078 --> 01:16:04,777 Hey! Hold it! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! 1009 01:16:04,821 --> 01:16:06,605 Where the hell you going? 1010 01:16:23,666 --> 01:16:27,278 Attention. We need to clear this area, people. 1011 01:16:27,321 --> 01:16:31,804 For your own safety, evacuate immediately. 1012 01:16:46,297 --> 01:16:49,169 Hey, Professor Kane! 1013 01:16:49,213 --> 01:16:51,737 Arizona, it's going down, baby! Whoo! 1014 01:16:51,781 --> 01:16:54,914 This may not be the best time for you boys to be drinking. 1015 01:17:01,355 --> 01:17:03,749 I was your first. 1016 01:17:03,793 --> 01:17:06,752 Remember, we discovered you in that cave. You were scared and alone. 1017 01:17:06,796 --> 01:17:09,189 It was just you, me and Harry in the beginning. 1018 01:17:09,233 --> 01:17:11,191 Those were good times, huh? 1019 01:17:11,235 --> 01:17:13,193 So why don't you level with me now? 1020 01:17:13,237 --> 01:17:16,327 You can trust me. Just talk to me. 1021 01:17:16,370 --> 01:17:20,374 Just tell me the secret. Tell me the answer. 1022 01:17:20,418 --> 01:17:22,550 Tell me how to kill you. 1023 01:17:22,594 --> 01:17:25,728 You are losing it, pal. 1024 01:17:25,771 --> 01:17:28,121 What is that stuff anyway? 1025 01:17:28,165 --> 01:17:31,995 Some of the original liquid material from inside the meteor. 1026 01:17:32,038 --> 01:17:34,606 Why hasn't it evolved like the rest? I don't know. 1027 01:17:34,650 --> 01:17:37,217 Uh, maybe because it was refrigerated. 1028 01:17:37,261 --> 01:17:40,220 It was locked in an airtight case. It didn't have anything to metabolize with. 1029 01:17:40,264 --> 01:17:42,745 But regardless, that doesn't give us any kind of clue as to-- 1030 01:17:46,183 --> 01:17:54,974 When did you start smoking? Not much of a point to clean living anymore. 1031 01:17:55,018 --> 01:17:56,236 Whoo! Ooh! 1032 01:18:10,381 --> 01:18:11,948 Whoa. 1033 01:18:16,779 --> 01:18:19,303 Those things react to fire like it was Miracle-Gro. 1034 01:18:19,346 --> 01:18:21,261 Fire. 1035 01:18:21,305 --> 01:18:24,264 The organisms were dormant in space. 1036 01:18:24,308 --> 01:18:26,789 Then they collided with the earth's atmosphere and bam! 1037 01:18:26,832 --> 01:18:30,270 Heat. Fire. That's the catalyst. 1038 01:18:30,314 --> 01:18:33,752 So if a little, teeny match catalyzes this stuff like this, 1039 01:18:33,796 --> 01:18:35,754 what's a ton of napalm gonna do? 1040 01:18:35,798 --> 01:18:38,844 So much for the military option. 1041 01:18:45,329 --> 01:18:47,374 You better call that dick general. 1042 01:18:52,728 --> 01:18:54,947 That's a lot of napalm. 1043 01:18:54,991 --> 01:18:56,993 Yes, it is. 1044 01:18:57,036 --> 01:19:00,257 We're going to blow those damn creatures straight to hell. 1045 01:19:00,300 --> 01:19:02,433 We'll flush them out along the mine shafts... 1046 01:19:02,476 --> 01:19:06,306 and then mop up the edges as they run trying to escape the flames. 1047 01:19:06,350 --> 01:19:09,309 Excuse me, General. There's an urgent call from Dr. Reed. 1048 01:19:09,353 --> 01:19:12,312 She says she has important information about the mission. 1049 01:19:12,356 --> 01:19:17,056 Oh, really? Well, unfortunately, I'm not available. 1050 01:19:22,148 --> 01:19:24,150 Anything more? 1051 01:19:24,194 --> 01:19:25,891 No, sir. 1052 01:19:32,245 --> 01:19:34,291 He blew me off. Can you believe it? 1053 01:19:34,334 --> 01:19:36,336 That bastard wouldn't even take my call. 1054 01:19:36,380 --> 01:19:38,643 You did call him an asshole. 1055 01:19:38,686 --> 01:19:40,645 Hey, Dr. K. 1056 01:19:40,688 --> 01:19:42,690 We got beer. Time to party. 1057 01:19:42,734 --> 01:19:45,345 Well, I'll take one of those. Me too. I just quit smoking. 1058 01:19:45,389 --> 01:19:49,741 What are you boys doing here? Thought you could use a brewski to mellow out. 1059 01:19:49,785 --> 01:19:52,526 Kick back and chill. Yeah. 1060 01:19:52,570 --> 01:19:54,920 Have a beer, relax. It's gonna help you with your research. 1061 01:19:54,964 --> 01:19:56,879 Yeah, help you with your research. 1062 01:19:56,922 --> 01:19:59,751 Whoa. Look at that thing. 1063 01:19:59,795 --> 01:20:03,537 Whoa. Hey, can we have that when you guys are done with it? 1064 01:20:03,581 --> 01:20:08,151 Fellas, thank you for your help and for the beers, but, really, we're working here. 1065 01:20:08,194 --> 01:20:10,153 Hold it. Hold it. 1066 01:20:10,196 --> 01:20:12,285 Look at that. What are you doing? 1067 01:20:12,329 --> 01:20:15,375 Selenium. It could be the answer. 1068 01:20:15,419 --> 01:20:17,508 I'm looking at the periodic table on your T-shirt here... 1069 01:20:17,551 --> 01:20:19,553 and I'm seeing this pattern emerge. 1070 01:20:19,597 --> 01:20:22,469 - Take off your shirt. - I'll show you. Yes! 1071 01:20:22,513 --> 01:20:26,125 No, I don't think so. All right, look. 1072 01:20:26,169 --> 01:20:29,172 We are a carbon-based life-form. Keep pulling, Dr. K. 1073 01:20:29,215 --> 01:20:32,915 We move down here and you found our poison, arsenic. 1074 01:20:32,958 --> 01:20:35,395 But the aliens are nitrogen-based, right? 1075 01:20:35,439 --> 01:20:38,921 You make the same move, down and over, 1076 01:20:38,964 --> 01:20:41,401 and where do you find yourself? 1077 01:20:41,445 --> 01:20:44,404 Selenium. Selenium. 1078 01:20:44,448 --> 01:20:46,972 It could be as lethal to them as arsenic is to us. 1079 01:20:47,016 --> 01:20:51,585 And with their metabolic rates, it'll kill them fast. 1080 01:20:51,629 --> 01:20:56,155 Okay. Selenium. How much do we need? 1081 01:20:59,028 --> 01:21:01,508 Five hundred gallons could do it-- should do it. 1082 01:21:01,552 --> 01:21:03,510 Five hundred gallons? Yeah. 1083 01:21:03,554 --> 01:21:06,209 Um, I hate to be a buzzkill, 1084 01:21:06,252 --> 01:21:08,602 but where are we gonna get that at 2:00 in the morning? 1085 01:21:08,646 --> 01:21:10,604 No problem. 1086 01:21:10,648 --> 01:21:12,998 Yeah, we can get that. 1087 01:21:16,610 --> 01:21:19,570 Head and Shoulders. The dandruff shampoo? 1088 01:21:19,613 --> 01:21:24,357 Yeah, that's the stuff. The active ingredient is selenium sulfide. 1089 01:21:24,401 --> 01:21:26,403 Oh. 1090 01:21:26,446 --> 01:21:29,623 How do you know that? You don't know anything. 1091 01:21:29,667 --> 01:21:33,540 Haven't you noticed how shiny and flake-free our hair is? 1092 01:21:37,457 --> 01:21:40,547 Okay, this is the best idea we got. 1093 01:21:40,591 --> 01:21:43,463 Let's give it a shot. Come on. Let's do it.Yeah. 1094 01:21:43,507 --> 01:21:46,640 Yeah. We'll get the troops together. We're getting shampoo! 1095 01:21:46,684 --> 01:21:49,469 I've got the perfect vehicle. Good. 1096 01:21:49,513 --> 01:21:51,994 Donalds, you just got your A's. 1097 01:21:52,037 --> 01:21:53,909 Yes! Yeah! 1098 01:22:01,003 --> 01:22:03,092 Almost full. 1099 01:22:08,140 --> 01:22:12,449 There's something I feel I should tell you, but I don't know exactly how. 1100 01:22:12,492 --> 01:22:14,712 Well, just say it. We're adults. 1101 01:22:14,755 --> 01:22:20,413 And we're all about to die a very horrible death soon anyway, so-- 1102 01:22:20,457 --> 01:22:22,981 I would have rocked your world. 1103 01:22:27,943 --> 01:22:30,293 You already have. We're all full! 1104 01:22:30,336 --> 01:22:34,123 Battle stations! 1105 01:22:36,473 --> 01:22:39,258 Can we continue this discussion later? Yes. 1106 01:22:39,302 --> 01:22:43,480 Let's do this! 1107 01:22:43,523 --> 01:22:45,656 Let's shampoo us some aliens! 1108 01:23:01,324 --> 01:23:05,284 Left, right, left! 1109 01:23:05,328 --> 01:23:07,286 Lots of soldiers around. 1110 01:23:07,330 --> 01:23:10,507 Left, two, three, four! 1111 01:23:10,550 --> 01:23:13,553 Left, two, three, four! Left, left! 1112 01:23:13,597 --> 01:23:16,556 There's an old abandoned silver mine about half a click south of here. 1113 01:23:16,600 --> 01:23:18,558 We can sneak into the cave through there. 1114 01:23:18,602 --> 01:23:20,952 "Half a click"? What are you, in Vietnam? 1115 01:23:20,996 --> 01:23:25,304 Hey, I'm digging this. Work with me, baby. Work with me. 1116 01:23:43,148 --> 01:23:46,760 It's over here! It's right here! 1117 01:23:49,372 --> 01:23:52,070 Are you okay? I'm good. I'm good. 1118 01:23:52,114 --> 01:23:55,595 Let's go. Let's do this. 1119 01:23:55,639 --> 01:23:59,121 You sure this leads to the main cavern? 1120 01:23:59,164 --> 01:24:02,124 It'll definitely lead us somewhere. Geology's not an exact science. 1121 01:24:05,605 --> 01:24:07,607 Where are you? 1122 01:24:07,651 --> 01:24:11,350 Where are you, my little aliens? 1123 01:24:11,394 --> 01:24:13,048 Show yourself. 1124 01:24:22,927 --> 01:24:26,757 Warm to the touch. 1125 01:24:26,800 --> 01:24:29,629 Ohh. Highly acidic. 1126 01:24:29,673 --> 01:24:33,590 Harry, we do not have time for you to act like you know what you're doing. 1127 01:24:33,633 --> 01:24:35,592 Hey, what happened to the respect? 1128 01:24:35,635 --> 01:24:37,855 Woodman's going at noon. We gotta hurry. 1129 01:24:40,684 --> 01:24:43,513 Very good. Are the troops in place? 1130 01:24:43,556 --> 01:24:47,125 Ahead of schedule. Excellent. We can go early. 1131 01:24:47,169 --> 01:24:51,216 Oh, no. What is he doing here? 1132 01:24:53,610 --> 01:24:57,048 Governor Lewis. I don't see anything burning. 1133 01:24:57,092 --> 01:24:59,790 Where are all the explosions? We're just getting underway. 1134 01:24:59,833 --> 01:25:02,053 I didn't know you were coming to see the show, sir. 1135 01:25:02,097 --> 01:25:06,144 Well, you damn well better make it a good one, Sergeant. That's General. 1136 01:25:06,188 --> 01:25:09,191 Not if you screw this up. Keeping my chair warm for me, are you? 1137 01:25:10,627 --> 01:25:12,629 Thank you. 1138 01:25:12,672 --> 01:25:15,414 I'll take a pair of spy glasses and a hot chocolate. 1139 01:25:15,458 --> 01:25:18,635 Give me your hose, Wayne. Get up top. 1140 01:25:18,678 --> 01:25:21,986 When I give you the signal, start pumping the selenium. 1141 01:25:22,029 --> 01:25:23,683 Got it. 1142 01:25:42,137 --> 01:25:45,488 Okay, we're gonna spray all around the meteor... 1143 01:25:45,531 --> 01:25:49,100 then get the hell out of here as fast as we can. 1144 01:25:51,276 --> 01:25:54,584 Oh, oh. Blue monkey. Blue monkey! 1145 01:25:56,063 --> 01:25:58,675 Wayne, charge the line now! 1146 01:26:00,764 --> 01:26:02,287 Whoa! 1147 01:26:08,163 --> 01:26:11,862 That's the napalm. Oh! Woodman went early. 1148 01:26:11,905 --> 01:26:14,038 Ohh! 1149 01:26:21,915 --> 01:26:24,266 Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad! 1150 01:26:24,309 --> 01:26:28,879 Wayne, come on! 1151 01:26:28,922 --> 01:26:30,663 Okay, I'm out! 1152 01:26:37,322 --> 01:26:42,153 We got to go! 1153 01:26:42,197 --> 01:26:46,723 Go! Go! Faster! Get up there! 1154 01:26:46,766 --> 01:26:51,206 Run! Run for your life! Go! Go! Go! 1155 01:26:55,906 --> 01:26:58,604 Quite the bonfire we got going there, General Woodman. 1156 01:26:58,648 --> 01:27:01,128 Should've brought some wieners. That can be arranged, Governor. 1157 01:27:01,172 --> 01:27:05,350 First reports from the field are excellent, sir. Very good. 1158 01:27:07,831 --> 01:27:10,181 Keep it together, Wayne. Keep it together. 1159 01:27:10,225 --> 01:27:12,966 Oh, my God. What is it? 1160 01:27:19,886 --> 01:27:22,324 What's happening? 1161 01:27:22,367 --> 01:27:26,980 It's coming! It's coming! What's coming? 1162 01:27:27,024 --> 01:27:29,592 Get the hell out of here! 1163 01:27:29,635 --> 01:27:31,594 Great flaming whore balls! 1164 01:27:31,637 --> 01:27:35,250 General, look. Ohh! 1165 01:27:49,176 --> 01:27:51,570 Hurry! Drive! 1166 01:27:51,614 --> 01:27:55,531 Go! Go! All right! 1167 01:28:06,411 --> 01:28:08,152 Oh, my God! 1168 01:28:13,026 --> 01:28:14,811 Oh, my God. 1169 01:28:47,496 --> 01:28:49,628 Fall back. Fall back! 1170 01:28:53,937 --> 01:28:56,809 What the hell is that thing? 1171 01:28:56,853 --> 01:28:59,203 The napalm forced an evolutionary response, 1172 01:28:59,246 --> 01:29:01,423 just like the match in the petri dish. 1173 01:29:01,466 --> 01:29:03,903 That's evolution? 1174 01:29:03,947 --> 01:29:08,647 Survival of the fittest. Often the simplest organism is the strongest. 1175 01:29:08,691 --> 01:29:11,389 Um, guys? It's freaking out. 1176 01:29:11,433 --> 01:29:15,045 It's starting to have some sort of spaz attack. 1177 01:29:15,088 --> 01:29:18,396 Oh, no. That's not spazzing out. 1178 01:29:18,440 --> 01:29:20,616 It's getting ready to divide. 1179 01:29:25,098 --> 01:29:26,709 Mitosis. 1180 01:29:26,752 --> 01:29:30,887 Wait. There's gonna be more of these things? 1181 01:29:30,930 --> 01:29:33,890 Yeah. A lot more. Its cycle is starting all over again. 1182 01:29:33,933 --> 01:29:37,937 It's gonna go on growing and doubling until it takes over. 1183 01:29:37,981 --> 01:29:43,160 Yeah. But we were here first. 1184 01:29:43,203 --> 01:29:48,818 So that Head and Shoulders idea-- Is that still the plan or what? 1185 01:29:50,907 --> 01:29:52,387 I'm driving. 1186 01:29:52,430 --> 01:29:54,258 I don't care if he's on Air Force One. 1187 01:29:54,301 --> 01:29:56,521 They've got phones on there. I've see them. 1188 01:29:56,565 --> 01:29:58,958 I don't think this is gonna wait an hour. 1189 01:29:59,002 --> 01:30:04,573 Hey, what's that fire truck doing out there? 1190 01:30:11,797 --> 01:30:13,146 Ooh-whoo-hoo! 1191 01:30:19,065 --> 01:30:20,502 Mama. 1192 01:30:27,378 --> 01:30:29,685 Can you believe this? 1193 01:30:29,728 --> 01:30:32,905 We got to find a point of attack. 1194 01:30:37,344 --> 01:30:38,955 There! 1195 01:30:42,175 --> 01:30:45,048 Ooh! 1196 01:30:45,091 --> 01:30:49,008 Ohh! Nasty! 1197 01:30:49,052 --> 01:30:54,013 Allison, stop, stop, stop. Right here. Right here. 1198 01:30:54,057 --> 01:31:00,019 Here we go. Get the ladder up! 1199 01:31:00,063 --> 01:31:02,587 Feed me the hose, Deke. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing? 1200 01:31:02,631 --> 01:31:05,024 I'm going up top. 1201 01:31:05,068 --> 01:31:08,332 Not before me. I got a major score to settle. 1202 01:31:08,375 --> 01:31:10,595 Go! Go! Go! 1203 01:31:26,002 --> 01:31:28,178 We don't have much time, guys! 1204 01:31:28,221 --> 01:31:30,049 Hurry! 1205 01:31:35,838 --> 01:31:38,057 Left! Left! 1206 01:31:38,101 --> 01:31:41,104 All right, I got it. I haven't had too much practice with this thing. 1207 01:31:41,147 --> 01:31:43,846 Whoo-whoo! 1208 01:31:43,889 --> 01:31:47,632 Stop! Stop! 1209 01:31:50,113 --> 01:31:53,029 What's going on? I don't know. But that damn thing's getting bigger. 1210 01:31:53,072 --> 01:31:57,468 What the hell are those guys doing with that ladder? 1211 01:31:57,512 --> 01:32:01,559 Looks like they're getting ready to administer a jumbo enema. 1212 01:32:01,603 --> 01:32:04,431 We got one shot. Let's do this. 1213 01:32:04,475 --> 01:32:08,044 It's payback time! 1214 01:32:10,612 --> 01:32:14,093 Whew! Whew! Keep it in there! 1215 01:32:14,137 --> 01:32:17,619 What's it look like I'm doing? 1216 01:32:17,662 --> 01:32:19,621 It's working! 1217 01:32:25,322 --> 01:32:27,063 Shit! Whoa! 1218 01:32:29,108 --> 01:32:33,112 What the hell? Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1219 01:32:33,156 --> 01:32:35,245 Give me back my friend, you big sphincter! 1220 01:32:35,288 --> 01:32:37,856 She's gonna blow! 1221 01:32:37,900 --> 01:32:41,251 Will you stop kicking? It's horrible in here! 1222 01:32:41,294 --> 01:32:44,123 I gotcha! Help me, please! 1223 01:32:44,167 --> 01:32:47,300 I got you! Hold me! Don't let me go! 1224 01:32:50,869 --> 01:32:53,524 We gotta get out of here! This thing's gonna blow! 1225 01:32:53,568 --> 01:32:56,135 You cannot imagine what I've seen in there! 1226 01:32:56,179 --> 01:32:57,876 Hurry up, guys! Come on! 1227 01:32:57,920 --> 01:33:01,880 Ira, don't you ever tell anyone where I've been! 1228 01:33:01,924 --> 01:33:03,665 Dear Lord. 1229 01:33:09,366 --> 01:33:13,849 Uh-oh. Time to go. 1230 01:33:13,892 --> 01:33:16,068 Go! Go! 1231 01:33:16,112 --> 01:33:17,374 Go! 1232 01:33:37,307 --> 01:33:39,962 Whoa! We did it! 1233 01:33:40,005 --> 01:33:43,139 Yeah! Yeah! 1234 01:34:15,432 --> 01:34:19,958 Here we go, sir. Just relax and we'll have you just as good as new. 1235 01:34:20,002 --> 01:34:22,482 I am happy to report... 1236 01:34:22,526 --> 01:34:27,226 that absolutely all remaining traces of the alien menace have now been eradicated... 1237 01:34:27,270 --> 01:34:30,142 using the selenium shampoo formula developed right here. 1238 01:34:30,186 --> 01:34:35,191 Now, let me introduce our civilian scientist heroes and their team, 1239 01:34:35,234 --> 01:34:39,195 the best that the great state of Arizona has been privileged to produce. 1240 01:34:43,590 --> 01:34:45,244 So this is your moment. 1241 01:34:45,288 --> 01:34:49,248 You wouldn't wanna miss this for anything, huh? 1242 01:34:49,292 --> 01:34:54,819 Firstly, I would like you all to meet Wayne Grey. 1243 01:34:54,863 --> 01:34:58,780 As of today, fully credentialed firefighter. 1244 01:34:58,823 --> 01:35:00,782 I spoke to the chief. 1245 01:35:00,825 --> 01:35:02,827 Ah, thanks, Governor. 1246 01:35:06,439 --> 01:35:11,096 Now our next hero, Professor Harry Block, noted geologist... 1247 01:35:11,140 --> 01:35:14,012 and the winningest coach in North Arizona women's volleyball. 1248 01:35:14,056 --> 01:35:16,275 I appreciate that, Governor. Very kind. 1249 01:35:16,319 --> 01:35:19,278 First of all, let's give it up to God. With Him, all things are possible. 1250 01:35:19,322 --> 01:35:21,759 Amen! Basically, we just played tough defense. 1251 01:35:21,803 --> 01:35:25,284 Took it one alien at a time, and we were able to come away with the big "W." 1252 01:35:25,328 --> 01:35:27,286 Thank you. 1253 01:35:27,330 --> 01:35:31,595 You're a hero! 1254 01:35:31,638 --> 01:35:37,035 And finally, Drs. Ira Kane and Allison Reed, 1255 01:35:37,079 --> 01:35:43,041 whose tireless efforts, research and academic findings led to the-- 1256 01:35:43,085 --> 01:35:45,870 I think he's giving her a bit of the Kane Madness. 1257 01:35:59,710 --> 01:36:03,322 Wow. Fighting the alien menace can be tough work. 1258 01:36:03,366 --> 01:36:06,456 And so is keeping your hair clean, shiny and dandruff-free. 1259 01:36:06,499 --> 01:36:09,764 So it's a good thing that we always keep a healthy supply of... 1260 01:36:09,807 --> 01:36:12,897 Head and Shoulders around the house.